


Two Joshes, The

by westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist



Category: The West Wing
Genre: F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-11-13
Updated: 2008-11-13
Packaged: 2019-05-15 04:26:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 37,897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14783571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist/pseuds/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist
Summary: This story shows a different and a bit darker Josh than Donna normally sees.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

“Are you in love with Josh?” 

Donna froze in the middle of what she was doing. Amy didn’t *really* expect her to answer that, did she? By now, Donna had passed the denial stage and admitted, to herself anyway, that she was in love with Josh. But the last person on the planet she was going to say that to was Amy; Amy who had done nothing but throw herself at him since she started working in the White House; Amy who found every available opportunity to remind Donna that she had a romantic history with Josh; Amy with her mousy brown hair and her smile that Donna NEVER saw reach her eyes; Amy that was all wrong for Josh -- okay, she was getting a little worked up now. She found reasons to come over here at least once a day. Josh seemed mildly amused, but not quite interested...yet. 

“Don’t answer that.” Amy said. “You don’t have to.” Okay. What the hell did that mean? Amy was taking the question back, or don’t answer it because it was probably written all over her face at the moment. “You said I had to get him. That’s my plan.” What the hell was she talking about? Donna still couldn’t speak, or look over Amy’s way. She did her best to keep her face in a mildly annoyed expression, and keep her distance from Amy. “My plan’s to get him back. I want him back. We’re good together.” 

“In fact, you’re not.” Donna said before she even knew she was speaking. 

“I’m sorry?” Amy replied. Donna froze. She couldn’t believe she just said that. What was worse, was she was sure that Amy was going to go back and tell Josh that she said it. Josh was a little unpredictable these days. She wasn’t really sure how he would handle hearing something like that. 

Screw it. 

“You’re not good together, Amy.” Donna replied. “You fight; you compete; you use each other politically. Maybe it’s great sex, I don’t know, but you’re not compatible in any other way.” 

Amy rose from her chair and took a few steps towards her. “It is great sex.” she goaded. Donna turned away. “Does it bother you to hear that?” 

OF COURSE IT BOTHERS ME YOU SLUT! Donna screamed inwardly, but what came out was, “Why would it bother me?” If Donna wasn’t going to admit to Amy that she was in love with Josh, she sure as hell wasn’t going to fess up that it bothered her when he slept with other women. 

Amy shrugged. “I don’t know. It just seems pretty obvious that you’re enamored with him. I can’t say I blame you, Donna. Working long hours with him every day, taking trips, going to formal dinners. The lines probably do get a little blurry every now and then.” 

“Nothing gets blurry, Amy.” Donna assured. “He’s my boss.” 

“Yeah, but you two are awfully close for a boss and assistant.” Amy said nonchalantly stepping closer again. “Everyone’s noticed it.” 

“Everyone? What do you mean?” 

“People around here.” Amy said gesturing to the empty bullpen. “It’s pretty obvious the way you follow him around.” 

“It’s my job.” Donna replied. “Things happen fast on this side of the building. Sometimes we have to talk about things when he’s in between other things.” Amy took note of Donna making the inference that things that happened in the West Wing were more important than things that happened in the East Wing. That annoyed Amy, though she couldn’t really refute that because it was true. 

“Well, despite your non-blessing, I do intend to get him back.” Amy replied. “I was just giving you a heads up in case you were planning on making your move.” 

“And what move would that be?” 

“Oh come on, Donna.” Amy scoffed. “Surely you’ve heard about the rumors about you two. They’ve been going around for years, Josh knows all about them.” 

“Rumors about what?” 

“The Deputy Chief of Staff sleeping with his leggy, blonde, young assistant.” Amy replied. 

“We’re not.” 

“I’m well aware of that.” Amy replied. “But I figure you must have thought about it. And given the way you look at him, well, I thought that sooner or later you’d be making your move.” 

“Well, despite whatever these rumors are,” Donna said. “I’m not in the habit of sleeping with men for political reasons.” 

“No?” Amy smiled maliciously. “Not in the mood for a little friendly competition?” 

“What are you talking about?” 

“You turn on your charms, I’ll turn on mine and we’ll see who he picks?” 

“I’m not fighting you for him, Amy.” Donna replied. “Not only is he also my friend, but he’s a human being, too. I’m not about to treat him like he’s a raffle drawing.” 

“Not to mention that’s in incredibly bad taste.” Came another female voice. Both Donna and Amy turned to see CJ walk towards them. Donna was never so happy to see her friend in her life. 

“Well, it looks like we’re done here tonight.” Amy said to Donna. “I have to go call a man about a date.” She turned on her heel and walked out of the bullpen. 

As soon as she was out of ear shot, CJ pounced on Donna. “Tell Josh.” 

“Not a chance in hell, CJ.” Donna said turning to her desk. 

“Donna! She was just a huge bitch to you. You have to tell Josh. He’ll be furious.” 

“No, CJ.” Donna refused. 

“Why? You’re his friend. He’s not going to stand for her treating you like that.” 

“Apparently, she doesn’t want him standing.” Donna spat disgustedly. She turned to pick up her tote bag. She just wanted to go home. And now, she wanted to go and get very drunk and forget that Amy was going to go throw her trampy self at Josh, and he was more than likely going to accept her proposition. 

CJ sighed and studied her friend. Just when she thought Josh and Donna were finally going to get it together and admit how they felt, something came between them and they each retreated to their respective corners. 

“That’s it, isn’t it?” CJ said softly. “You don’t want to tell him because then you’ll have to talk about why Amy brought it up in the first place.” 

“CJ, I already went ten rounds with Amy on this tonight. Are you really going to make me do this with you, too?” 

“No.” 

Donna picked up her bag and slung it over her shoulder. She was just about to close up Josh’s office for the night when the secret service came barreling in. “West Wing is crashed; West Wing is crashed. Ms. Cregg, Ms. Moss, you’ll have to stay in here until further notice.” The agent ushered them into Josh’s office and closed the door before CJ could ask what was going on. Donna rolled her eyes and flopped down into Josh’s chair. 

“Josh’s got beer in his fridge.” Donna noted to CJ. “Want some while we wait?” 

********************


	2. Two Joshes, The

“Morning.” Josh greeted Donna as he passed her desk the next morning. 

“Morning.” she mumbled not looking up. He stopped in his tracks and walked over to her. 

“What’s wrong?” he asked. She looked up in his direction and fixed an annoyed expression to her face. “Other than the obvious thing that’s wrong with everyone today.” 

“Nothing.” she grumbled looking back down at her computer. Josh wasn’t convinced. 

“Are you feeling all right?” 

“I’m fine.” she snapped crossing to the filing cabinets. He could see that she was anything but fine. He could tell by her body language she had a problem with him this morning. She wasn’t meeting his eyes and she was now putting distance between them. He crossed over to her and she countered him back to her desk, just as he predicted she would. 

“Okay then.” he said letting it drop for now. He supposed she could just be tired. The White House was locked down last night and he knew that she was stuck here. So, he figured it was possible that she was tired. But he’d seen her on less sleep than this and she didn’t tend to be grumpy. Lack of sleep usually made her pretty wired. 

He turned to walk into his office and found CJ standing there waiting for him by his desk. She nodded for him to close the door to the bullpen. He couldn’t help thinking this was getting weirder and weirder. He crossed over to his desk, just as the phone started ring. 

“Yeah.” he answered picking it up and looking down at his messages that Donna left on his desk for him. 

“Hey, J.” Amy purred on the other end. 

“Hi, Amy.” 

“Don’t take that call!” CJ hissed at him. Josh’s eyes snapped up to CJ’s and she looked frantic. 

“I gotta call you back.” He said into the phone. 

“But -” Amy couldn’t get anything else out because Josh dropped the receiver into the cradle, disconnecting the call. 

“What the hell’s going on?” he demanded. 

“You can’t talk to Amy yet.” CJ said. 

“Well, I got that from your insistence I hang up on her.” Josh replied. “Why?” 

“This may seem like a strange question coming from me, but did you get together with her last night by any chance?” 

“CJ, Charlie and I were stuck at that party until 3 a.m. last night.” Josh reminded. “When they finally let us go, I just went home and crashed. Again, I ask what the hell is going on?” 

“Donna refused to tell you about this, but...” CJ began. Josh sat down in his chair behind his desk and leaned back a bit. It sounded like he was about to find out what was wrong with Donna this morning. 

“Tell me what?” 

CJ sat down in one of the chairs opposite his desk and took a deep breath. “Josh, the last thing in the world I want to do is get in the middle of your personal life.” 

“But it sounds like you’re about to anyway.” 

“Well, I think it’s for the greater good.” CJ replied. “I think this is one of the those things that if I didn’t tell you and you found out later, you’d say why the hell didn’t anyone tell me.” 

“You’re wandering now, CJ.” Josh noted. 

“Last night, Amy and Donna were working over here on that thing for the First Lady.” CJ began. “I walked in during a conversation they were having about you.” 

Shit, thought Josh. He didn’t want to have to this conversation, and he sure as hell didn’t want to have it with CJ. But Donna was in a bad mood, CJ looked freaked out, and Amy was calling him first thing in the morning. Something was definitely up. 

“What were they saying?” 

“Well, it’s really what Amy was saying.” CJ hedged. “It seems that Amy is interested in getting back together with you. She was kind of goading Donna about her past, shall we say, dalliances with you.” Josh could feel his blood start to boil. He was beginning to see that this was going in a direction that was going to piss him off. “Amy was going on and on to Donna about how everyone around here could see how much she liked you and things must get blurry to her with all the time you two spend together, and how there were all these rumors going around about the two of you.” Josh sighed and rolled his eyes. The more CJ talked, the more upset with Amy he was getting. What business was it of hers to be saying things like that to Donna anyway? “Then she seemed to have challenged Donna to a bit of a contest.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Apparently, it was they’d both go for you and see who you picked.” CJ blurted quickly. Josh’s eyes practically bugged out of his head. Was she kidding him?! Amy challenged Donna to a contest to see who could get him? Were they in high school? 

“What did Donna say?” he asked quietly. 

“She said you were her friend and a human being and not a raffle drawing.” CJ replied. “That’s when I made my presence known.” Josh hopped out of his seat and leaned up against his bookcase and ran a hand through his hair. He couldn’t believe the nerve of Amy. Well, he could believe the nerve of her. But what did Donna’s response mean? He wished CJ had heard the whole conversation. He knew he was going to go over to the East Wing and tell Amy to back off, that much he was sure of. But he was pretty sure it wasn’t going to make the problem with Donna go away. 

“The thing is,” CJ continued cautiously. “Amy’s observations may not be far off, and I’m kind of thinking you feel the same way about her.” Josh snapped his head towards her. He was about to take her head off for saying it, but then he started thinking that there really was no use denying it if he was so transparent lately that CJ noticed it. “I have a feeling that if they actually did each go after you, you’d pick Donna over Amy.” 

“I’d pick Donna over anyone, CJ.” He said quietly. 

“That’s what I thought.” CJ replied. And now she was in a catch 22. As his friend, and Donna’s friend, too, she wanted them to be happy; as the Press Secretary for the administration, which was currently going through a huge crisis, this was not timed well. 

“Why can’t everyone just leave well enough alone?” Josh demanded frustrated. He pushed himself away from the book case and moved back by his desk. “Why does everyone always have to fuck everything up?” 

“Josh, I don’t think Donna’s happy with well enough anymore.” CJ said. 

“You don’t think she’s happy?” This was not 100 percent news to him. There were days when she did seem less than thrilled to be here. She had talked a few times about wanting more responsibility. 

“There are days that I don’t think she is.” CJ admitted. “Mostly, she seems happy. But there are days I look at her and think she’s too young to look that sad.” 

“Do you think she’d have to transfer?” Josh asked CJ without asking the other question. 

“I don’t know.” CJ confessed. 

“There’s already rumors about us.” Josh reminded. 

“Unfounded rumors.” CJ retorted. “Speculation is a lot different than you and her walking out of this building holding hands and kissing in romantic restaurants.” That comment gave Josh pause. He liked the thought of walking out of this building holding Donna’s hand and kissing her in a romantic restaurant. But did he like it enough to give up what they had now? If the romantic thing didn’t work out, they’d have nothing at all. That was absolutely not an option. Frankly, he couldn’t see how the romantic thing wouldn’t work out though. He didn’t see how they’d be anything but completely compatible. He was an idiot at relationships though. But then again, she also confessed to being lame at them, but she kept trying. They kept dating people that were completely wrong for them, the complete opposite of each other. That had to mean something, right? 

“Where are you going?” CJ asked as she watched him cross to his door. 

“To see Amy.” 

He flung open the door and charged past Donna without a look over. Donna ran over to his office door, cornering CJ in there. 

“You told him!” she accused. 

“Yes, I told him.” CJ replied. “He’s my friend, too, Donna, and I wasn’t going to stand by and let Amy do that to him. I don’t know how you could.” 

“I wasn’t going to stand by.” Donna scoffed. “I was going to sabotage.” CJ smiled at Donna. Of course she would have found a way to make sure Josh didn’t go out with Amy without having to tell him what she’d said. 

“Well, I did one better than that.” CJ shrugged non-commitedly and began walking down the corridor toward her office. Donna stared after her wide-eyed for a minute and then raced after her. 

“No, no, no, no, no.” Donna said falling into step with CJ. “You don’t get to say something like that and then just *walk away*” 

“I got a lot of work to do today.” CJ reminded. “I have a lot of agencies to touch base with, I’ve got a briefing in half an hour. I have to find out what’s going on in the Oval. I can’t spend all morning on Josh’s love life. You know, country in crisis and all that.” 

“Did you tell him everything?” Donna demanded ignoring her attempted mock brush off. 

“Only what I heard.” CJ confessed. CJ noted that Donna suddenly looked panicked. 

“Tell me you didn’t.” she said quietly shaking her head. 

“I did.” 

Still with a look on her face that was between shock and downright mortification, Donna turned around and wordlessly left CJ’s office. CJ watched her slowly walk down the corridor, allowing herself the first hint of a grin since they found out last night about Zoe. 

***********************


	3. Two Joshes, The

Josh burst into the East Wing like a man on a mission. “Is she in?” he demanded of Amy’s assistant. Before the woman could even answer, he barged through Amy’s door and slammed it behind him. Amy looked up startled from her desk, then plastered a smile on her face. He looked pissed. 

“Phone wasn’t good enough for you, J?” Amy purred. “Just had to see me in person?” 

“Something like that.” Josh responded. Amy rose out of her chair and walked around her desk. 

“Here for a specific purpose, or are you just here for my company?” 

“Trust me when I say, it’s not the company.” 

The smile on Amy’s face immediately melted. “What happened? Donna tell on me as soon as you walked through the door?” Amy said testily walking back around her desk and sitting in her chair. She turned her chair a bit to the side so she would be sure he could see her cross her long, shapely legs. 

“No. Donna’s barely talking to me this morning, actually.” Josh admitted. Amy grinned like the Cheshire Cat again. This was good news. “CJ told me.” The grin disappeared. He didn’t look happy. 

“And what did CJ say?” Amy stuck her legs back under her desk and leaned forward on her elbows, folding her hands. 

“She told me what she overheard you and Donna talking about.” Josh replied. Amy didn’t look sorry. 

“Well, that saves me a lot of trouble then.” Amy noted. 

“We don’t work, Amy.” Josh replied. “We didn’t work before, we aren’t going to work now.” 

“I asked her if she was in love with you, you know.” Amy said. Well, if he was going to be this way about it, she was at least going to push his buttons, so she went right for the big red one. 

“Don’t fuck with me, Amy.” He warned. 

“She didn’t answer me.” Amy continued as if he hadn’t spoken. “Think that means no?” 

Josh took a few steps closer to her desk and put his hands casually in his pockets. Amy noticed a transformation come over him. He was no longer seeing her as her, as his ex-girlfriend, and once lover. He was seeing her as a political problem, or a Republican bug to be squished. 

“You went up against me once, Amy.” he reminded her in an even voice. “I recall that not ending all too well for you.” 

“Are you threatening me?” she asked with an air of being totally unconcerned. 

“No. It’s not my style to make threats.” Josh replied. “I’m simply reminding you that I’m the guy in the building whose job it is to have all the dirt.” Her eyes widened at his statement. She was all too familiar that Josh could play dirty politics better than anyone she knew. She had once seen them as a DC power couple. She saw them going great places together. Maybe he wasn’t the great love of her life, but she certainly lusted after him enough, and she thought they were compatible enough to make it work. He apparently, did not. 

“Have you ever let Donna see this side of her precious Joshua?” Amy sneered. She couldn’t help but note that he didn’t so much as flinch, but she continued on anyway. “The one selling his soul to the devil behind closed doors, making shady deals in dark rooms? I wonder what sweet, innocent Donna would think of the dark side of her man? Think she’ll stick around when she discovers that you’re not as idealistic as she thinks; that your means of winning aren’t always on the side of good? I wonder what she’ll think of her hero then? How do you think it’s going to look, you two? The Deputy Chief of Staff screwing his blonde assistant? Not quite Capraesqe, is it? I’m sure your reputation will on improve, while hers...well, you know what they’ll say about her.” 

“You’ve gotten a taste of what happens when you cross me.” Josh replied. “You’ve been warned.” He turned and strolled out of the office. Amy sat back in her chair in a huff. She didn’t want to be unnerved by him just then, but she admittedly was. She didn’t know what he had on her, or if he was just bluffing. It was no secret that he was a crappy liar, but he could bring the intimidation like no one she’d ever met. War had been declared. 

************** 

Josh returned to the bullpen in a sour mood. He glanced up at the t.v.s They were still showing continuous coverage of the kidnaping, reminding him of just how crappy a day it was. The President was staying away from his staff. People were starting to whisper about the 25th Amendment. Something that Josh didn’t want to think about. Without a Vice President, the President would be handing off power to the Republican Speaker, and handing the republicans the election. At the same time, he couldn’t begin to comprehend what the President was thinking and feeling right at that moment. 

He turned the corner and saw Donna moving about her cubicle. And now there was this issue to deal with. The big white elephant came out and introduced itself. He’d come to realize that they were past the point where they could just ignore it until they forced themselves back to the way they were. CJ was right. There were days he could see she was sad. He’d tried to deny it, but he knew there were days when he looked the same way. Those days used to be few and far between; they were much more frequent now. 

“Donna.” he said when he arrived at her cubicle. She looked up at him and he immediately saw that something was wrong. She was upset and she was trying to hide it. He nodded towards his office and turned to enter. She followed him into the office and he directed her to close the door. He stayed in the center of the room, instead of going behind his desk like he normally did. This time, he didn’t want the reminder between them that he was her boss. This time, he just wanted to be Josh and Donna. 

“I asked you what was wrong this morning and you told me nothing.” He began. She dropped her gaze to the floor and he sighed. Here we go again. The only time Donna didn’t look in his eyes was when they were talking about something personal. Any time they bantered, she looked him straight in the eye; any time they debated, she looked him straight in the eye; any time she thought he was going to be disappointed in her, she looked at the floor. 

“We can’t talk about this.” she replied. 

“We have to talk about this.” he countered. 

“You don’t want to have this conversation, and I don’t want to have this conversation.” Donna said. “Let’s just go back to work and forget it.” 

“No.” 

“This is your last chance to stop this, Josh.” Donna warned. 

“I get the feeling there’s something you want to tell me, Donna.” he replied. “I’m not letting up until I pull it out of you.” 

“Fine.” she snapped annoyed and finally looking up at him. “Keep your whore away from me.” She was expecting to shock him and get a rise out of him. She didn’t. 

“You’re jealous.” he smiled. 

“Please.” she scoffed looking away. 

“You are!” he laughed. 

“Don’t be an idiot.” 

“Oh yeah?” he challenged. “Then look at me and say it.” 

You know, for someone who was notoriously not stealthy, Josh could move pretty fast. When Donna had dragged her gaze up to him, he was standing directly in front of her. Her breath caught when she saw how close he was. He continued to slowly walk towards her, as she walked backwards. She stopped when she felt the door behind her. 

“You went to her.” she softly accused failing to hide the pain in her voice. 

“I went to her to tell her to back off and stay the hell away from you.” He replied. He was toe to toe with her, his breath now mingling with hers. 

“You did?” she asked looking up at him. He nodded in response. His face was drawing closer to hers and she was beginning to tremble. She couldn’t believe this was happening now. “Why?” 

“I tend to get a little protective when people mess with you.” He had stopped moving in. His lips were now about an inch away from hers and he was looking directly into her eyes. Her eyes were wide and searching and his were dark and intense. 

“Josh.” 

“Yeah?” 

“What’s going on here?” 

“I think I’m about to kiss you.” 

“You think? You don’t know?” 

“If I kiss you, what are you going to do?” 

“Kiss you back.” 

“Yeah?” 

She nodded. She had lost all power of speech. The President’s daughter was missing, they have no Vice President, and he chooses now to change their relationship. 

“Josh?” came a third voice from over the intercom. He groaned quietly in frustration and dropped his forehead against hers. 

“Yeah?” he called out. 

“Leo would like to see the senior staff in his office in ten minutes.” Margaret announced. 

“Yeah.” he said. He heard Margaret disconnect and looked back into Donna’s eyes, keeping his head against hers. Donna hadn’t even noticed that she brought her hands up and they were now resting lightly on his waist. 

“What’s that look for?” he asked when he saw her disappointed gaze staring back at him. 

“It’s always something.” 

“Not this time.” 

“Leo --” 

“I’ve got ten minutes.” Josh reminded bringing his hands up lightly to her face. “That’s plenty of time to kiss you breathless.” 

“Breathless, huh?” she smiled. 

He nodded as he closed the distance. Fire burned through her when his lips connected with hers. She grabbed onto his shirt as the kiss deepened. One of his hands snaked around her waist as the other tangled up into her hair. He was as good as his word, she had to pull back for air. Josh was glad to see she also looked a little dazed. He smiled and gave her a soft kiss. 

“I guess we have some things to talk about then.” she said breathlessly. 

“Yeah.” 

He stood upright more, and she grabbed on tighter. “Don’t let go yet.” she pleaded 

“I don’t think you have to worry about that any time soon.” he smiled kissing her forehead. She wrapped her arms around his chest and leaned in to him. He wrapped his arms around her and breathed her in deeply. 

“This is nice.” she sighed. 

“Yeah.” he replied chuckling at her statement. He pulled back and was giving her the same intense look he was giving her before. 

“Josh?” 

He brought a hand up and gently trailed it down her face, down her torso, and linked his hand with hers, bringing it to rest in between them. “Come home with me tonight.” It was a husky voice she had never heard from him before. His intentions were loud and clear, and suddenly, she was glad he was still holding on to her because she felt her knees giving out. 

“Are you sure?” she asked. 

“Yes.” 

“Okay.” she smiled. 

“And stay the night.” 

“Stay the night?!” 

“Go home on lunch, pack a bag, drop it off at my place, and stay with me tonight.” he qualified. She couldn’t believe he was asking her this. She waited years for this conversation, for him to look at her like he was, and hold her like he was. She wondered if she would ever be able to get used to the look in his eyes right now. “Please.” he said softly when she didn’t answer right away. 

She smiled again. The please sounded desperate, and this was not a man who begged anyone for anything, Donna was sure much less a woman to be with him. “Yes.” He smiled in return and pulled away from her with one last kiss. 

“I got to go over to Leo’s.” 

“Kay.” Still smiling, she moved away from the door and opened it up for him. He squeezed her hand and walked by her. Now, Donna had the impossible task of going back out to her desk and attempting to concentrate on work. 

TBC


	4. Two Joshes, The

It was late when Josh came back to his office to get ready to leave. Donna was waiting for him at her desk. She had seen the Speaker enter the building and she didn’t have to be told what was happening. She immediately walked back to her desk and proceeded to cancel all Josh’s meetings on the hill for the rest of the week. She couldn’t be sure, but she was pretty certain that if there was a Republican in the Oval Office, Leo would be stopping all legislating for the duration of their stay. 

She wasn’t exactly not a fan of Speaker Walken, though she’d never admit it to Josh. She didn’t agree with him politically, but he was a man with strong convictions and stood by the things he said. She assumed he had to have some integrity to rise to the exalted position of Speaker of the House. He stopped at her desk as she wrote in his last rescheduled appointment for the following week. 

“What are you doing?” he asked. 

“Rescheduling your week.” she replied. 

This was why he wanted to try to find a way to have her both at work and out of work. What other assistant could he get that could see Walken walk in the building and immediately be reactive to that without having been told to? How was he going to replace someone like that? 

“It’s done?” she asked. 

“Yeah.” he nodded. 

“Well, what do you know? Democracy works.” She smiled half-heartedly. “Do you want to stay?” 

“This is the last place on the planet I want to be right now.” 

“Okay.” 

He walked into his office and grabbed his backpack, as she shut down her computer and grabbed her tote bag. They finished at the same time and met in the corridor between his office and her cubicle. They stood there a moment looking at each other. A small smile came on her face, and he mirrored her. They’d left at the same time a hundred times before, but tonight, they were going home together. They weren’t leaving to grab a working dinner, though it certainly appeared that way as they turned and walked out of the bullpen with a respectable distance between them. They were going back to his place, where Donna vowed that she would do everything in her physical power to comfort him. 

As they walked into his apartment and dropped their bags, they turned to face each other. Donna could read him like a book. He was clearly disenchanted tonight. The President was definitely doing what was best, but they just elevated the most powerful Republican in the country. He had the reigns, and he had full control. He could legislate, he could pick a Vice President, he could send them to war if Zoe wasn’t brought back alive. His allegiance was to one President, who had asked him to faithfully serve another. 

She raised her arms to him and he stepped right into her embrace, holding her tightly. “It’ll be all right.” she assured softly. “Leo will know what to do.” He pulled back and kissed her. This kiss was very different than the one in his office earlier. This morning, the kiss was full of tenderness and wonder; this one was full of need. The need for reassurance that everything they worked so hard for wasn’t going to come tumbling down around them; the need for reassurance that Zoe would return safely; the need for reassurance that they were really here with each other. 

Donna made the first move. She loosened his tie and slid it off his neck, then went to work on the buttons of his shirt. She pushed his shirt off his shoulders, as he went to work on her neck, while he simultaneously stepped out of his shoes. She divested him of his pants, while he grabbed the hem of her sweater and pulled it over her head and her pants quickly joined his. He paused for a minute while he took in the sight of her in a black lace bra and underwear. She blushed briefly, unused to having him look at her like this. 

“You’re perfect.” he whispered. 

“Bedroom.” she replied. They stumbled along, still locked at the lips. When they made it into his bedroom, she stepped away from him. He could just make her out in the dark from the light in the hallway. She had moved over to the night stand and was lighting candles. 

“You brought candles?” he smiled as the soft light washed over her. 

“Do you mind?” 

“It’s a great idea.” 

Instead of moving back to him, she slid across the bed. She propped herself up on her elbow and bent a leg. The look she gave him was nothing short of ‘Come Hither, Joshua,’ but he couldn’t move yet. All those times he had envisioned having her here, he wanted to take the time to truly appreciate the moment. The candlelight flickered and she trailed a hand up along the side of her body. That was all he needed. He dove across the bed at her and pulled her close, devouring her mouth with his. She grabbed at the hem of his shirt and out of sheer force of habit, he stayed her hand. The only woman he’d been with since Rosslyn was Amy, and he’d never taken his shirt off with her, and she didn’t care. She wasn’t after his chest anyway. Donna paused for a minute. It hadn’t even occurred to her that he might be uncomfortable without a shirt on in front of her. She wasn’t quite sure what to make of it. 

“If you’re not taking your shirt off, then I’m putting mine back on.” she said firmly. “Fair’s fair.” 

He looked at her for a second and cocked his head to the side. Until she said something, he hadn’t even realized that he stopped her. He pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it aside. 

“How is there no fat on you at all?” she demanded as she looked him over. 

“My assistant makes sure I eat right.” 

“You certainly are a lucky man to have an assistant that takes such good care of you.” she quipped. 

“It’s one of the many reasons why I love her so much.” 

Donna froze and looked up at him. Tears pooled up in her eyes. 

“I certainly hope those are tears of happiness.” he said warily. 

“They are.” she whispered, bringing her hands up to his face. “I love you, too.” 

“Say it again.” 

“I love you, Joshua.” she whispered again. 

He smiled and looked down at her for a moment. She was now running her hand down his chest and then up along his back. He certainly hadn’t intended to tell her that tonight. But for some reason, he couldn’t do this with her and not have her know that. He couldn’t have her think that this was just like any other time he’d been like this with a woman. Because this wasn’t any other woman, and this wasn’t like any other time. He reached around and unfastened her bra, while she slid his boxers off, and her underwear followed. 

They paused again. Well, this was it then. They’d seen each other naked and they were really going to do this. 

“You’re so beautiful.” he whispered. 

“So are you.” 

“Men can’t be beautiful.” he protested. 

“Sure they can.” she disagreed. 

“No, they’re handsome, or they’re hot.” 

“You’re going to tell me that I’m beautiful, and I have to tell you that you’re hot?” 

“Yes.” 

“Uh-uh.” she rejected shaking her head. “I pick my own compliments.” 

“But that one sounded girly.” 

“There’s nothing girly about you right now, Josh.” 

It was the way she said his name. It was his undoing. She could call him a Republican right now, and he’d be fine with it, as long as she said his name like that again. She spoke his name like she was saying a prayer. He dropped his head to her breasts and ran his hand between her legs. She gasped when he slid his fingers into her. 

“Hurt?” he mumbled into her breast. 

“Hell no.” she panted. “Oh my God, no.” She threw her arms out to the sides and arched her back to him, grabbing a fist full of sheets. 

“Well, if you’re that into that...” he said grinning wickedly. She cried out as his fingers were replaced with his mouth. One hand continued to grab the sheet while she brought the other to her mouth and bit her fist. She cried out his name as her body exploded and trembled around him. He crawled back up and knelt over her, there were tears in her eyes and he grinned down at her. 

“You’re really good at that.” she said still dazed. He laughed and then swept her on top of him. She straddled his hips and sat up. 

He stared up at her completely enchanted. Her body was still flushed from her recent orgasm and her hair was mussed up. 

“Okay. If you stay up there like that, I think my head might explode.” 

“Oh yeah?” she replied. 

It was her turn to be wicked. She pushed herself straight up on her knees and he gulped in anticipation of what she was going to do. Slowly, ever so painfully slowly, she impaled herself on him. When she couldn’t take any more of him in, she slowly closed her eyes, dropped her head back and sighed. It was simply the most erotic moment of his life. It was all he could do not to fall over the edge right there. She shifted a little and he groaned. She tugged on his hand and he sat up and wrapped his arms around her while she locked her ankles around his back. He started trailing kisses along her collarbone, and she took the time to revel in the feel of him filling her, while he kissed her. They stayed like that for a few minutes, neither moving their lower bodies and just enjoying the feeling of being joined in the only way left they could be, caressing each other, and growing accustomed to just being with each other in this way. 

“This is where you belong.” She said, kissing him. 

“This is where I belong.” He agreed. 

He swept her back beneath him and they stretched out. He gave her one last soft kiss before starting to move. Donna moaned with the pleasure of it. She never thought of herself as a noisemaker during sex, but that night she was moaning and chanting his name like a mantra. And for the second time that night, she was biting her fist against the outstanding ray of light that was washing over her. He took her fist from her mouth and wound his fingers with hers. The feel of her trembling around him and whispering his name sent him over the edge with her. He was stunned stupid by how powerful his orgasm was. What a difference doing this with the woman you loved was. He’d definitely had great sex before, but he never made love to a woman who deprived him of the ability to think. 

They stayed that way while they drifted back to themselves. He rolled them to their side, managing to not break their new connection. He could stay like this forever, surrounded by her, basking in her sated afterglow. 

“Josh?” she asked. God, he loved how she said his name! 

“Mmm?” He looked over at her and there were tears in her eyes. “Oh shit, Donna! Did I hurt you?” 

“No, no!” she quickly assured. “It’s happy tears again.” He smiled and traced her cheek with his finger, then kissed her lightly. “I think I just found religion.” She sighed snuggling into him. Suddenly, he was laughing. Before he knew it, it was a big belly laugh. 

“We were having a nice moment here, Joshua.” She pouted. 

“I’m sorry! It’s not like I’ve ever had complaints, but I haven’t had anyone get quite that complimentary.” 

She scowled and dragged her finger lightly along his chest. She brought it straight up the center and he sucked his breath in. 

“Are you okay?” she asked pulling back. He nodded and she realized why he reacted that way. She looked down at the long scar that bisected his chest. She leaned down and placed a kiss over his heart then dropped her head back to his shoulder. 

“You’re not shocked.” He noted. 

“By seeing the scars?” she asked and she felt him nod. “Why would I be shocked? It’s not like I didn’t know they were going to be there. I watched your surgery.” 

“Did you really?” he asked interested. Nobody ever talked about that day with him. Nobody ever tried to fill in the blanks for him of what was going on when he was unconscious. “Well, that would probably freak me out.” 

“It didn’t freak me out.” She said. 

“Why did you watch?” 

He felt her shrug in response and he nudged her with his shoulder. “I just wanted to stay close by.” She confessed quietly. “I saw your heart.” 

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Did it say Donna on it?” 

TBC


	5. Two Joshes, The

“God, Donna!” Josh yelled. “Your feet are like two blocks of ice!” 

“What do you expect?” she countered. “Your apartment is like a meat locker. A girl could get hypothermia in here.” They were lying together on Josh’s couch. Donna had turned the air conditioning down in his apartment twice now. She finally gave up and pulled a blanket over them. 

“I’m sure I can think of something to warm you up.” he leered in her ear. 

“Josh, I thought we decided to stay in here, so we could have that talk and not be distracted.” Donna reminded. 

“Any time you’re near me, I’m driven to distraction.” he murmured against her neck. Donna sighed and tipped her head back on reflex. He was using misdirection, and she knew it, but what a way to be misdirected! She yanked the blanket over her head, effectively cutting his affections off. “Well, I know stuff you can do under there, too. Ooophf!” She smacked him in the stomach in response to his innuendo. “All right! All right! You win!” She came out from under the blanket smiling victoriously with her hair mussed up. She looked so damn cute, he couldn’t help but kiss her. “You should be happy I’m this attentive. This is a huge compliment here, I can’t keep my hands off you.” 

“Joshua, focus.” Donna said. “What’s going to happen to me at work?” 

“Honestly?” he sighed. “I don’t know.” She looked panicked by that response and he rushed to reassure her. “You’re not going to get fired or anything like that. I just don’t know if Leo will keep letting us work together.” She sighed and a look of gloom settled over her face. “I know.” he said softly. “I think that part sucks, too.” 

“Would I have to leave the building?” 

“Probably not.” 

“He’s not going to stick me over in the First Lady’s office is he?” Donna asked. She’d quit working in the White House before she worked for Amy. 

“Hell no!” Josh protested. “I won’t let him do that. I’ll sooner promise to keep my hands off you than feed you to the wolves.” 

“I mean, I wouldn’t have a problem working over there normally, but not for HER.” 

“No, I know.” Josh said. “You know I can’t talk to Leo though until this whole thing with Zoe is resolved, right?” he hedged. “The last thing Leo’s going to want to deal with right now is moving around personnel.” 

“I wish he’d let us stay together.” Donna moped. 

“He might.” Josh said. “I mean, he knows we work well together, and you’re the only one who will put up with me, and can keep up with me. But at the same time, that’s kind of setting a precedent, and not everyone there is us.” 

“That’s too bad for them.” Donna shrugged. He smiled and leaned in and kiss her forehead. She snuggled in against him and sighed. There was still a sadness behind her eyes. 

“You’re still freaked out about that ransom note?” he asked softly. 

“She looked so scared, Josh.” Donna replied. “She’s such a great kid, and she must be terrified right now.” 

“I know.” He had always liked Zoe. They had hit it off during the campaign. He’d always tease her mercilessly. CJ used to tease him that Zoe had a crush on him, and maybe she was right. But Josh always thought she was a smart, funny, dedicated kid who was hopelessly devoted to her dad. He knew she’d be happy for them right now, and teasing him mercilessly right back about taking so long. 

“I just hope they’re not doing anything horrible to her.” Donna had put everyone’s fear into words. Noone had dared voiced the things that could be happening to the President’s daughter right now. Donna was right, she did look terrified in that picture. And as long as Josh lived, he’d never be able to forget the look on Zoe’s face in that ransom note. 

“So, what do you want to do if you’re not allowed to stay with me?” Josh asked changing the subject abruptly. The last thing he wanted to think about was the possibility of what Zoe could be enduring at that moment. 

“I don’t really know how to do anything else.” she said quietly. 

“Well, that’s bullshit.” he scoffed. “You run the entire operations department. You interface with Congressmen and Senators all time; you’re the best researcher I’ve ever met; you’re usually the first to come up with a spin. I’m serious, Donna. If Leo makes you transfer, I don’t know what I’m going to do. You’re irreplaceable.” 

“You’re biased.” she countered. 

“To a degree.” he admitted. “But I thought that before you started with the amazing sex.” 

“You’re problem is if I move departments, you’re going to be bored. You’re not going to have anyone to entertain you.” 

“True.” he sighed. “And I was so looking forward to the new form of entertainment coming my way.” 

*************************** 

“Josh, get the hell in my office.” Leo demanded when he saw Josh in the corridor. Josh gave him a confused look, but followed him into his office. He raised his eyebrows when Leo proceeded to close all the doors. 

“What’s up?” 

“How long have you and Donna been together?” he asked frankly. 

Josh’s eyebrows shot up. “How did you know?” he asked stunned. 

“I didn’t find out from your idiot ass, that’s for sure.” Leo grumbled. 

“It’s only been 24 hours, Leo.” Josh said. “I swear to God I was going to tell you about it as soon as we got Zoe back. I just didn’t want to bug you with something like this now.” 

“I’m half inclined to actually believe you had good intentions here.” Leo continued. 

“I did, I promise.” Josh continued. “I just didn’t think you wanted to deal with something like this now. I swear I wasn’t sneaking around.” 

“You should have come to me before you did anything.” 

“It wasn’t planned.” Josh protested. Well, mostly wasn’t planned, he added to himself. 

“This is a thing, right?” Leo asked. “This isn’t just another one of your ensorcelled moments? Because quite frankly, Donna’s a good girl. I don’t want to lose her because you’re an idiot.” 

“Ensorcelled? No, Leo.” Josh admitted. “Head over heels in love? Yes.” 

Though Leo was surprised to hear him say it out loud, he wasn’t surprised by the sentiment. Josh and Donna had been orbiting each other for years. It was really only a matter of time. Leo had to admit that he had actually thought about what he would do if the day came that Josh had come to talk to him about this, the problem was, he had never been able to come to a decision. 

“I’ll do whatever you say, Leo.” Josh said. “But for what it’s worth, if we can, we’d really like to keep working together. I’m a total nightmare when she’s not around.” 

“Well, that’s true.” Leo said. He sat down in his chair and leaned back, looking up at his deputy and the man he considered a surrogate son. Josh actually looked calm right now, which was a strange state of being for him. Josh was always in motion, always worked up about something. To see him actually at peace, well, that certainly was a sight to behold. And Donna was perfect for him. She kept him in line without taking his shit. She handled him better than Leo had ever seen anyone handle him. Well, come to think of it, Leo actually never saw anyone successfully handle Josh. Even his parents were never really able to reel him all the way in. But Donna, Leo smiled, Donna could snap her fingers and tell him to heel and he’d fall immediately into line. He’d hate to break them up. 

“I’ll be honest with you, Josh,” Leo said. “I don’t know what to do here. Part of me says if I transfer her, operations will fall completely apart, and obviously I’m not moving you. The other part of me says if I let this go, I’ll be setting a bad precedent for the rest of the building, and maybe those people aren’t as good as you two.” 

Josh was surprised to hear Leo repeat his words to Donna almost verbatim. “You’re right though,” Leo continued. “I don’t want to deal with this now. So, here’s what’s going to happen. She’s going to stay where she is for now, and you keep a low profile together. I don’t want any pictures of you two popping up in romantic restaurants or cozy out on the mall or something No kissing in the corridors or holding hands on the way out. I don’t want anyone thinking you’re anything more than what you were yesterday, especially when this building is crawling with the republican leadership.” 

Josh nodded his agreement hastily. He’d agree to just about anything right now to get Leo’s blessing. He turned to walk out, but stopped and turned around when a thought struck him. “How did you know?” 

“You’re ex-girlfriend is not very fond of you.” Leo noted. 

“Well, if I wasn’t as mature a person as I am, I’d tell you about…” 

“CJ already did.” Leo said cutting him off. “Amy’s not long for this building, but right now, with the East Wing paralyzed for the foreseeable future, I’m not too concerned with her. But you’d be wise to watch your back.” 

“Oh, I am.” Josh assured. “I’ve been kind of expecting her to start pulling this crap. Quite frankly, I was more looking out for her to pull something about Donna though.” 

“I’m sure she will.” Leo replied. “Which is why it’s important for you to keep a low profile.” Josh nodded and left Leo’s office. Leo sat in his chair watching the door Josh just left through, a small smile creeping across his face. 

TBC


	6. Two Joshes, The

Josh walked back into the bullpen and nodded to Donna for her to come into his office. She stood up and followed him. She crossed the threshold and closed the door. As soon as the door was closed, he had her up against it. 

“This is becoming a favorite past time of yours.” She laughed as he pulled away from her lips and moved to her neck. 

“No. Being naked with you is becoming my favorite past time. This is my quick fix.” She smiled as he kissed her again, and then pulled away. “I love that I’m kissing you in my office now. I feel like I waited forever for this.” 

“Well, I’m kicking myself for not letting you have a couch in here.” She replied as it was her turn to drop open mouth kisses down his neck. 

“I told you!” he exclaimed triumphantly. “I told you when we moved in that you’d end up regretting the day you said no to a couch.” 

“I stand by my original statement though.” She chided. “A couch in your office means you’ll sleep in your office.” 

“Maybe one day that was true, but now I’ve got you to go home to.” She gifted him with another smile but refrained from pointing out that not only have they only spent one night together, but that they didn’t live together. She liked his thought process though. She told him she loved him last night and she felt liberated for it. She knew he was the one, and she was pretty sure he felt the same way. He’d told her that he loved her, and she found it unlikely that he’d said that to any of his past girlfriends. Love implied trust, and trust was not something that Josh Lyman gave to just anyone, especially someone in the political arena. 

He pulled away and looked into her eyes. It was that intense look again. He’d given her that look a lot in the past 24 hours. “I should probably tell you that Leo knows.” Josh watched as her blue eyes instantly filled with panic. “It’s okay.” He assured quickly. “He said he’ll deal with it later, but right now to keep a low profile.” 

“Was he pissed?” she croaked. 

“He was a little annoyed with our timing, but no. He’s not pissed.” Josh assured. 

“How could he possibly know?” Donna asked incredulously. 

Josh shrugged. There was no way he was telling her yet that it was Amy. “He’s Leo, he knows all. It’s like Kreskin, Nostradamus, and Leo. He’s like one of the world’s most amazing Prophets.” She smiled and relaxed. She was still amazed with all that was going on the last few days that she was still able to smile so damn much. She felt a little guilty, but she also knew that Zoe would kick her ass if she found out that Josh and Donna had the opportunity to get together and didn’t because they were stressing over her. 

“I didn’t call you in here to tell you about Leo though.” He confessed. 

“I didn’t think you did.” She replied. “I thought you called me in here to molest me behind closed doors.” 

“Well, there is that.” He smirked and she playfully smacked him in the arm. “And there’s also the fact that I wanted to ask you to stay with me tonight again.” 

And there she went smiling again. Was it really just two days ago that she was terrified that Amy was going to get her hooks into him again? After one night together, he wanted more of her. 

“Too much of a good thing could be bad.” She teased. 

“There’s no such thing as too much of you.” He whispered. He said it with such sincerity that for a moment, it wiped the smile right off her face. “You’ve invaded my mind and body, Donna. You’re becoming my new obsession. If I don’t have my fix, I think I’ll start shaking with withdrawal. I don’t even have to make love to you, though I promise you I will, I just need to breathe the same air as you.” 

“That was pretty eloquent.” She quipped. “There’s proof that you went to Harvard after all.” 

“And Yale. Don’t forget Yale.” 

“Of course.” She smiled. 

“So you’ll stay?” he asked hopefully. 

“Always.” 

He leaned in and kissed her again. But this time it quickly became more hungry. He had one hand on her breast and the other massaging between her legs. Before she knew it, she was unfastening his belt and unzippering his pants. He sucked in his breath as she grabbed hold of him and ran her other hand through his hair. She worked her way out of one leg of her pants and wrapped her free leg around him. Blinded by lust, she was only aware of the feeling of him inside her. She grabbed onto his shirt and bit into his shoulder to keep from crying out. They were done in mere minutes. For a time, they only sound in the office was that of their mingled heavy breathing. She linked her hands behind his neck and search out his eyes as she slowly lowered her leg. His expression cleared and his eyes widened. 

“Josh?” 

“I can’t believe that just happened.” 

“Don’t.” 

“I can’t believe I was just standing here talking about being obsessed with you and that just happened!” He suddenly felt like a monster. He started to back away from her, but she tightened her hold. “It should never be that way with you.” 

“Stop it.” she ordered. “Don’t you dare cheapen it.” 

“But, Donna, that was --” 

“What we do to each other, Josh.” she finished. She was still breathless and when she said his name, he dropped his forehead against hers. “I hope I didn’t hurt your shoulder.” She smiled. 

“You can kiss it better later.” he smiled back. 

“Just your shoulder?” she pouted. “I had such grand plans.” He stepped away and they set their clothes to rights again. With one last kiss, she disappeared through the door. 

TBC


	7. Two Joshes, The

Josh paced the lobby of the White House like a caged tiger. He’d been here ever since Carol and Henry went to go get Donna. CJ had come barreling into his office about half an hour ago and switched his office t.v. to MSNBC. They had watched astounded as reporters were surrounding Donna’s building, evidently their relationship was leaked and was one of the stories on the morning show. Donna had called him from her cell phone freaking out because she was trapped inside, and CJ sent Carol and Henry over to bring her in and corral the press. 

It didn’t take Josh long to figure out the mastermind of the leak. He and Donna had been following Leo’s instructions to a T. They didn’t go out to any public places, they stayed away from each other in the West Wing. True, they spent their nights together, but unless you were following them, you wouldn’t know they were. Donna had left his place this morning to go back to her apartment to get ready for work, and by the time she’d come back out to leave, the front steps and sidewalk of her building were crawling with reporters. Leo had stormed into his office and demanded Josh and Donna’s presence as soon as she got in. The morning was not going well. 

Donna, Carol and Henry came rushing into the lobby. Carol and Henry headed straight for the West Wing, and Donna walked over to Josh when she saw him. 

“What the hell!?” she demanded loudly. 

“All you all right?” he asked concerned. 

“Yes.” she confessed. “I’m a little frazzled, but I’m all right. What the hell’s going on? Who told them? The only people who knew were you, me, Leo and CJ.” 

“And Amy.” Josh hedged. “She’s the one that told Leo.” 

Donna’s expression hardened and instead of turning toward the West Wing, she turned towards the East Wing and began stomping off in that direction. 

“Wait until I get my hands on that backstabbing, spiteful --” 

“Noooo, no, no, no.” Josh said catching her arm and spinning her around back towards the West Wing. “Leo wants us in his office. You’re not going over there to pick a fight. I’m on that already.” 

“Really?” she asked unconvinced. “The reporters were waiting for me.” 

“They’ll be waiting for me, too.” 

Donna was still in a sour mood when they walked past Margaret into Leo’s office. Margaret closed the door after they entered, and Donna noted the other doors to the office were closed. This did not bode well. 

“THAT’S WHAT YOU CALL KEEPING A LOW PROFILE!” Leo barked as soon as the door was closed. 

“We were, Leo.” Josh defended, never one to back down in the face of a pissed off Leo. “Someone told them.” 

“Who?” he demanded. “If you were keeping a low profile, who could have possibly told them?” 

“The same person who told you.” 

“Why? What could she get out of it?” 

“Revenge.” Josh supplied. “She’s punishing Donna.” 

“Well, normally this is your department to deal with,” Leo began, “but you can’t deal with her on this; it’s got disaster written all over it. I’ll send Toby over there.” 

Donna hazarded a glance over to Josh for his reaction to that. He didn’t seem surprised to hear that. She was more than a little shocked to see him letting Leo pass something that was personal to him off to Toby to deal with. When Josh was personally offended, Josh wanted to be the one to bring the smack down, but Leo was sending Toby instead. This was un-Josh-like. 

“What happens now?” Donna asked quietly. 

“I don’t know yet.” Leo sighed. “The President is still adjusting to Zoe being back and the First Lady whisking her off to New Hampshire, and everything else going on now. I think I’m going to let it sit for a few days to gauge reaction.” Donna didn’t like that sound of that, but she wasn’t about to challenge Leo. She didn’t like the fact that her job was going to be suspended in limbo until Leo deemed fit to decide the fate of it. She already knew that she wasn’t going to be fired, but whether or not she could keep her job or was going to get transferred remained to be seen. 

“You’re awfully quiet, Josh.” Leo noted. 

Josh just shrugged in response. “I told you that I’d do whatever you said.” 

“All right. Go back to work.” Leo said. “I think it goes without saying to stay the hell away from the press room for the next few days.” 

Josh and Donna headed back to Josh’s office in silence. Donna noted several looks from other staffers. She wasn’t sure if they were looking for signs that the story was true, or if they were nervous that Josh was going to explode. Either way, it was just best to stay out of the Deputy Chief of Staff’s way. When they walked into Josh’s office Toby was waiting for them. 

“Good morning, Donna.” Toby greeted having already seen Josh that morning. 

“Hi.” Donna mumbled in response. 

“I was heading over to the East Wing.” Toby said to Josh. “Anything in particular you’d like to add to what I’m going to say already.” 

“Nope.” Josh said, surprising both Donna and Toby. “I’m sure whatever you say will get the point across. It’s not the first time you’ve done this.” 

“I’m just going to go over there and do my thing and you’re going to be okay with it?” Toby asked. 

“I trust you completely, Toby.” Josh said sitting down in his chair. 

“What’s going on, Josh?” Toby asked. 

“What do you mean?” 

“We have to scrape you off the ceiling when bullshit like this happens.” Toby replied. “You’re personally involved in this one, and you’re calmer than I’ve ever seen you before. Donna was harassed by reporters this morning, and that’s not the end of it, and still, you don’t even seem mildly inconvenienced by it. This is all very out of character for you. So, again, I’m asking what’s up?” 

Josh looked up at Toby for a long moment before answering, “Nothing’s up, Toby.” 

Toby nodded and turned towards the door. “I’ll catch up to you later then.” 

Donna wasn’t sure what just happened there, but she was pretty sure something was just conveyed to Toby in that look. Donna sat down on the other side of the desk and studied Josh. 

“What?” he asked after a few moments. 

“I don’t understand what’s happening here.” she confessed to him. 

“We’re going to be hounded by reporters for a bit, and Leo’s going to decide whether or not to split us up.” Josh recapped. “What do you mean you don’t understand?” 

“Toby’s right.” Donna said. “I don’t understand why you’re not freaking out right now. You just let Leo pass your personal life off to Toby.” 

“I told Leo I would do whatever he said.” Josh continued. “I’m not looking to make trouble for Leo and the President.” 

“I didn’t say you were.” Donna countered. “I just don’t understand why you’re not freaking out right now. Amy leaked us to the press, she fed us to the lions.” 

“I’m aware of that.” 

“Yet, you don’t care.” 

“I didn’t say I didn’t care.” 

“You’re not freaking out.” 

“Would you rather me yell and slam things around?” he asked. 

“I know what to do when you do that.” Donna confessed. “I don’t know what this is.” 

“Maybe it’s a more mature me.” He smiled when she let out a surprised laugh. 

“I find it hard to believe you’re just going to let this go.” 

“Who said I was just letting anything go?” he said. “You and Toby are awfully quick to make assumptions here.” 

Josh looked away from her again when she started to study him curiously. She was trying to read him. She was trying to gauge what was really going through his mind, and to keep that from her, he couldn’t make eye contact with her. He was livid. He was screaming inside. He didn’t want Amy to get away with it without a response from him. But he didn’t want Donna to have anything to do with it. Amy was right. There were sides of Josh that Donna didn’t know, and he couldn’t afford to ever let her know those sides. She was too important to him to be subjected to that. 

There were reasons that she never accompanied him to meetings on the Hill. There were reasons she was confused when she heard people talk about how ruthless he was. She didn’t see that Josh. Not that he was ever anything but himself around her, but there were two Joshes; the Josh she knew, and the political Josh. The political Josh wasn’t always a good person. He was cunning, calculated, manipulative, clever, never made a move without thinking through the full consequences of it. All the reasons why Leo came to find him specifically in the first place, and why Josh went to find Sam originally. Sam was wide-eyed, patriotic and naive in some ways, but when crossed, a formidable enemy. Josh was never more sorry that Sam left than at this moment. 

Donna stood up and moved toward the door. He thought she was going to go back to her desk, but she closed the door instead and moved back over to him. She sat down across his lap and pinned him in the chair, and he kept his hands on the arm rests of his chair. He still didn’t look up at her, so she was forced to hook her finger under his chin and raise his gaze to her herself. 

“Tell me what’s going on.” she ordered. 

“No.” he refused. 

“What does Toby know that I don’t? You said you were already on it, but you’re actions are suggesting the opposite.” 

“I’m doing what I was told to do.” he replied. 

“I think you’re lying to me.” she confessed. She thought he’d be outraged by the accusation, but his expression never changed. 

“You always say I’m a crappy liar and have no poker face. You always say you can see right through me.” 

“I can.” she replied. “But you’re not meeting my eyes right now.” 

Finally, he looked up at her and wrapped his arms around her. He brought her face down to his and kissed her. When he pulled away, he was unguarded for a moment. 

“What are you going to do?” she asked a little nervously, cocking her head to one side. But the moment was gone. He gave her a peck on the forehead and a little push. 

“Go get to work.” he said. “We don’t want to give Leo incentive to split us up.” She seemed unsure, but stood up and left his office anyway without looking back and closing the door behind her. She never saw the dark expression fall over his face as he leaned over and picked up the phone. 

TBC


	8. Two Joshes, The

“...if convicted of the allegations of conspiracy to commit bribery and tax evasion, Ms. Gardner could face up to 30 years in federal prison and a $1 million fine. Ms. Gardner is a well-known lobbyist in Washington and we are told today resigned as Chief of Staff to First Lady Abigail Bartlet, who is said to be at the Bartlet’s New Hampshire farm with their youngest daughter Zoe who is recovering from her recent kidnaping. Again, recapping our top story, Lobbyist Amelia Gardner has been indicted today by a federal grand jury for multiple counts of...” 

Amy switched off the t.v. in her office in a huff and turned back to the large box on her desk that she was currently piling her personal belongings into. 

“Secret Service will be here in a couple of minutes to escort you from the building.”came a voice from the door. Amy looked up to see Josh leaning casually against the door frame. 

“Well, J, you certainly weren’t messing around when you said it was your job to have all the dirt.” Amy said dryly not making eye contact with him. 

“What makes you think I had anything to do with this?” Josh countered. 

“They’re going to investigate the First Lady.” Amy replied. “I wouldn’t have thought you’d shoot yourself in the foot to bring me down.” 

“All they’ll find there is that Mrs. Bartlet is a bad judge of employees.” Josh shrugged. 

“How long until CNN starts mentioning your name with mine, do you think?” 

“Dating spiteful women isn’t a crime.” 

“It’s still your name linked with a potential felon. People will remember that.” 

“Again, I’m not too concerned.” 

“Still, I don’t think I’d ever have taken you for playing politics quite this dirty.” 

“First of all, Amy, that’s exactly what you’ve accused me of previously.” Josh retorted. “Secondly, I don’t know why you’re so sure I’m behind this.” 

“You warned me.” she reminded quietly. 

“Yes, I did.” 

“What I can’t figure out is where you got it from.” 

“Again, you’re assuming I had something to do with this.” Josh replied. “It hasn’t occurred to you that you might have enemies in this town?” 

“We all do.” 

“Yes, we do. I’ve got one more it seems.” he agreed. “Or one less, should things not go your way.” 

“We could have gone all the way to the Oval Office, you and I.” Amy said. 

“I have no desire to put my name plate on that door.” he countered. “I never did. That’s really why we didn’t work, isn’t it Amy?” Two secret service agents chose that moment to enter her office. 

“Please.” she scoffed. “You’re not near as idealistic as she believes you are. She’s definitely smart, I’ll give her that. I just wonder what she’ll think of you now.” Josh didn’t respond to that. He merely watched the agents escort her from the office. 

*************************** 

Donna watched the television sets in the bullpen in amazement. They were recapping the story of Amy and now they were showing footage of her leaving the building. 

“So, that’s what he had up his sleeve.” murmured a voice next to Donna. Donna turned at the sound of CJ’s voice. 

“Who?” she asked. 

“Josh.” CJ replied. “We all wondered why he didn’t freak out about Amy tipping the press off to you guys. That’s why.” CJ said gesturing to the t.v. “He’s always got something.” 

Donna looked back at the television, but she was no longer hearing the story. CJ was implying that Josh knew about this. But that couldn’t be. How could he know something like this and not say anything sooner? 

“No.” Donna said shaking her head. “That’s not like him to just be walking around with this kind of information. If she’s guilty, that means he would have known that she committed felonies and he didn’t tell anyone.” 

CJ looked at Donna for a long moment. “Josh has been around this town for many years,” CJ reminded. “He’s got stuff on everyone.” CJ turned and walked away from her as Donna absorbed that information. That didn’t sound like Josh to her. He didn’t fight dirty like that. But then she remembered why he and Amy broke up; he had said he bought her boss. She sat down in her chair and turned to her computer. She stared at her monitor, trying to remember what she was working on before they had seen the news report on Amy. 

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw him go back into his office and close the door. Would he really have gone this far just because Amy siced reporters on him? No. He went this far because Amy siced reporters on her. This wasn’t about him; this was about her. He said himself he gets protective when someone messes with her. She teased him all the time about how powerful he was, but now the evidence of how powerful he really was playing on every major news network. 

Several hours later, he left without a word for a meeting on the Hill, and Donna stayed at her desk most of the time. But as was her habit, as the time neared when he should be returning, she walked into his office and sat down in his chair, watching out the window. CNN was muted on the t.v. She must have zoned out at one point because she didn’t actually notice him come back into the building. When he reentered the office and saw her in his chair, he softly closed the door, slid his backpack into a visitor’s chair and threw his jacket over it. He spun the chair around and then leaned up against the bookcase, waiting for her to speak first. 

She looked up at him, and the look she gave him was unnerving to him. She was looking for answers in his gaze. She was looking for reassurance that he wasn’t the mastermind of this; reassurance that if they broke up, she wasn’t going to be a headline story on Hard Copy. 

“Ask me the question.” he said softly. 

“I don’t want to.” she replied looking down at her hands. “I don’t want to know.” 

“You already do.” He moved to kneel in front of her and took her hands in his, silently happy at the fact that she didn’t pull away. “Donna.” 

“The diary.” 

“What diary?” 

“My diary, Cliff, you know about that.” 

“No.” he said quickly when he realized what she was getting at. “That’s not what that was.” 

“How do I know that? You could have said that to her.” she said gesturing to the t.v. 

“Because I love you.” 

“How do I know you didn’t say that to her?” 

“I’ve never said it to any woman before.” 

She looked in his eyes and knew he was telling her the truth. He could never look her in the eye and lie. That’s why last week when she asked him what was going on, he wouldn’t meet her eyes. He was telling her the truth now; a truth she desperately needed to hear. 

“This is what people hire me for.” he said softly. “This is why Leo wanted me.” 

“You didn’t do this for the President.” 

“No.” 

“You did this for me.” 

“Yes.” 

“You can’t do these things for me.” 

“I beg to differ.” 

“Josh.” she pleaded. 

“No, you’re wrong.” Josh interrupted. “Amy leaked our relationship for the sole purpose of punishing you. And she did it, so I would react like this, though I don’t think she expected this. She wanted you to think I’m not the person you think I am. She wanted to plant the seed of doubt. Looks like it worked.” 

Donna’s eyes snapped up and met his. “No, it didn’t.” 

“Sure it did.” he said sadly. “You doubted me before. That’s why you asked me about the diary. Because you’re worried one day you’ll be her.” Donna shook her head to refute that, but he continued. “It’s okay. I’m not proud of some of the things I’ve done in my career, Donna. I’ve never done anything illegal; ethically gray, yes, but not illegal.” 

“I know.” she said softly. 

“Yeah?” She nodded her head and he brought his hand lightly up to her face to cup her cheek. 

“You’ve been worried about me finding out about this.” This time he nodded in response. She leaned in and kissed him. “It’ll take more than that to get me to leave.” 

TBC


	9. Two Joshes, The

Donna lay on her back in Josh’s bed later that evening, Josh was curled around her dozing, but she was still awake. It had been a late night at work, and she managed to keep the pajamas on that they’d gone to bed in. True to his earlier confessions, sometimes Josh really did just want to breathe the same air as her. 

“Josh?” she asked softly. 

“Mmm?” 

“You awake?” 

“Not technically.” 

“Kay.” 

“No. What’s the matter?” 

“Do you ever get scared?” 

He scrunched up his forehead in confusion and looked down at her. She was wide eyed looking back up at him. “Yes.” he replied. “But what are you specifically referring to?” 

“That you know too much.” He chuckled in response and she slapped his arm. “Deny it if you will, but I *know* you actually know what I’m talking about right now.” 

“You’re afraid someone’s going to take me out because I know people’s secrets?” he grinned. 

“Yes.” 

“Seriously?” 

“Yes.” 

“Donna, everybody knows stuff in this town. It’s not like I’m the only guy that’s got dirt on people.” 

“Who else is there?” 

“I don’t know. It’s not like we’ve got identifying jackets and a secret handshake.” 

“Josh!” 

“I’m sorry. I don’t know those kinds of secrets, I’m not a spy.” 

“Do you think there’s someone out there that’s got stuff on you?” she hedged. 

“I told you, I haven’t done anything illegal.” 

“The diary.” 

“You did the illegal thing there.” he countered. “I just covered it up. That’s shady, but not necessarily illegal. At least, I don’t *think* so.” 

“I thought you actually graduated from law school.” 

“Sometimes I think it’s possible I didn’t.” 

“Still...” 

“I don’t know.” he shrugged. “Somebody probably knows about Stanley, well, both Stanleys.” 

“I don’t think Stanley would say anything.” 

“It’s not hard to figure that out, Donna.” Josh replied. “You’re not the only one who thought I was acting weird. He met with me at the White House. It’s not like it was a well hidden meeting or anything. All you have to do is look at security’s log sheet for the day.” 

“How do you put something like this on a resume?” she queried. “Keeper of Secrets? Knower of Stuff?” 

“My reputation usually precedes me.” he replied. “Leo and Hoynes both sought me out. I can’t remember the last time I actually applied for a job.”She sighed, putting her arms around him and pulling him in to her. 

“What’s wrong?” he asked. “ Would you feel better if I went to Mike tomorrow and spilled my guts?” 

“I just don’t want you to get your guts spilled because of something you know.” 

“I told you, I don’t know that kind of stuff. Plus, the people I know stuff about, don’t know I know stuff about them. Donna, Leo knew my dad; that’s how he knows me so well. Hoynes found out because he was on the tail end of something I knew and he thought it best I work for him instead of against him. Please stop obsessing over this. It’s exactly what Amy wanted.” 

“Okay.” she said snuggling in closer to his chest. 

He pulled her face up to his. “Okay?” 

“Yes.” He kissed her on the forehead and pulled her close. She reached up and stroked his face. He closed his eyes again, but they flew back open with her next statement. “I lived through hell once because something bad happened to you.” 

“Stop.” he said tightening his hold. “Don’t do this.” 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to freak you out.” 

“I’m not freaked out.” 

“You’re not?” 

“I just don’t want you to get this upset because of me.” He rubbed her back for a few minutes and he felt her body relax. She pulled back so she could look at him and began to lightly stoke his arm. 

“I must say,” she smiled. “I never thought you’d be quite this attentive.” 

“What?” he demanded with a scowl. “What the hell does that mean?” 

“I don’t know.” she shrugged. “You’re a taker at work. But when it’s just us like this, you’re such the giver.” 

“Of course I’m a taker at work, I’m your boss.” 

“Unfortunately, not for much longer.” she said sadly. 

“That remains to be seen.” he reminded. “The press went away already, nobody cared.” 

“We *think*.” 

“This is you getting upset again.” he pointed out. He smoothed the hair out of her face and kissed her forehead. 

“And this you giving again.” she purred in return. 

He rolled her onto her back and moved above her. “You want to see how much I can give?” he dared kissing her neck. “I can give a LOT.” 

“Yes, you can.” she agreed tilting her head and arching her back as his hand slid beneath her shirt. 

Later that night, she slept in his arms, but he stared up at the ceiling. Amy had gotten to her, but just not the way she had intended. Donna was now completely freaked out that something bad would happen to him. He was telling the truth though, he didn’t know *those* kinds of secrets, career damaging stuff, yes, but nothing anyone would kill over. And it wasn’t like he was font of scandal inducing information either. He just happened to know that stuff about Amy because she wasn’t careful when he was at her house. 

He slid out from underneath her and quietly went to the kitchen He poured himself a glass of water then headed back to the bedroom. He paused in the doorway and watched Donna sleeping for a few minutes. It was still so new to see her there; so new that he still wasn’t 100 percent sure it wasn’t a dream. 

She startled herself awake and called his name. “I’m over here.” he said from the doorway immediately moving to her. He put the water on the night stand and sat on the bed next to her. She didn’t seem to see him, though her eyes were looking straight at him. She immediately moved her hands around his chest. 

“Are you all right?” she asked almost frantically. She was having a dream, he realized and she wasn’t quite awake yet. 

“Yes, I’m fine.” he said softly taking her hands. She was so worried about him now, she was dreaming about it. Damn Amy, damn her, damn her, damn her, and damn her again. 

“You’re not bleeding.” she said. Damn Amy, he thought again. 

“I’m fine, Donna.” he said again. “You’re sleeping, you’ve got to wake up.” He shook a little bit and she shook her head and then seemed to recognize him. 

“What’s going on?” she asked looking nervously around. 

“You were dreaming.” he said. “You were like talking in your sleep and doing a whole thing.” 

“Oh God!” she groaned falling back against the pillows. “What did I say?” 

“That I’m the love your life and that there’s no one better than me on the planet.” he smirked. 

“Well, that’s true, but what did I really say?” 

“I don’t know what it was about, but you seemed to be worried about me.” he answered honestly. 

She stared at him for a minute. “Friggin Amy.” she said hotly. 

“My thoughts exactly.” he smiled. 

“This is all your fault, you know.” 

“I do, in fact, know that.” he replied. 

“I was only kidding when I said that.” she said sitting back up. “It’s just more fun to blame you for stuff. Why do you think it’s your fault?” 

“Because I went out with her.” 

“You’re dangerous when you’re ensorcelled.” 

“Not half as dangerous as I am when I’m in love.” 

She smiled and kissed him. She still couldn’t believe he was finally saying these things to her. Finally telling her she was beautiful (not that he hadn’t complimented her looks before though); finally telling her he loved her; finally looking at her unguarded. She kept waiting to wake up and for him to disappear into her dreams like he always did. This was always the part when she woke up, right when she had him and she was happy, the alarm clock went off, which was probably why she was spending so much time waiting for the other shoe to drop now. 

“I have an idea.” he said between kisses and gently pushing her back down on her back. 

“It’s 3 o’clock in the morning, Joshua, aren’t you tired at all?” she replied. 

“That actually wasn’t my idea, Donna, but I like your thinking.” He pulled away and dropped his head onto the pillow and she turned in his arms and looked at him. 

“What then?” 

“Go down to HR today and change your address.” 

“What?” she asked confused. “To where?” 

“To here.” 

“To here? Why would I do that?” 

“Well, it would only makes sense to do that if you were living here.” 

She was speechless. She was speechless and he smiled. It wasn’t often he rendered her speechless. In fact, it might just have been never. It’s usually her rendering him speechless. 

“You don’t think it’s too soon for that?” 

“I never wanted you to move out.” he said softly. 

She ran her thumb across his cheek and smiled softly. It was painful when she thought about how long they wanted each other. She stayed with him while he recovered from being shot and she remembered very clearly the day she realized she was in love with him. It was very early in the morning, about this time, come to think of it, and he’d had another nightmare. She’d run in to make sure he was all right, and he asked her not to leave. So, she climbed into bed with him, wrapped her arms around him and he fell back into an unhindered sleep. She stayed awake the rest of the night holding onto him as if his life depended on it, and when the sun started to come up, she slipped from the bed, into the bathroom and cried her eyes out. 

It was the night they crossed the line and saw what could be. And they both proceeded to get completely freaked out by it. 

Josh came back to work and the misdirection began with renewed vigor. But then Christmas came; and she stayed with him again on Christmas Eve. And the walls came down again that night, but then she had a hard time putting them back up. He never asked her to stay with him again until that morning in his office a few weeks ago, and, like many, many odd moments like that over the years, they never brought up that night or the first one. And she dated Cliff; and he dated Amy. Sometimes she wondered if Amy was in retaliation for Cliff, because after that, she dated Jack. And Jack, though nice, and charming, and a decent enough kisser, was certainly in direct retaliation to Amy. 

But they were here together now and he was telling her that he wanted her to move in with him; a step that thoroughly freaked him out when Amy wanted to take it, but seemed so logical when he asked her. He hadn’t even intended to ask her really, he just did. He saw her sleeping there and next thing he knew, he wanted to see her like that every night. He wanted her to be the last thing he saw at night and the first thing he saw in the morning. He wanted to comfort her if she had a bad dream, and sooth her if she had a bad day, which at the moment would more than likely be his fault anyway. He wanted to be surrounded by her, and her stuff, and the things she loved. She wanted him to yell at her for not eating breakfast again and take over all the closet space. 

She was kissing him again, and whispering that she loved him, and this was the best of all his reasons for wanting her to live with him. 

“So, that’s a yes?” 

“That most certainly is a yes.” 

TBC


	10. Two Joshes, The

Donna walked into the human resources department the next morning. She didn’t really know the people that worked here that well. She never really had to deal with them. Donna, on the other hand, was well known throughout the building, even before Amy leaked her relationship to the press. Everyone in the building knew who the Deputy Chief of Staff was, and since Donna was usually by his side, by extension they knew her. Of course, all 1300 people working in the building didn’t know Donna personally, but she was usually afforded a certain amount of respect in the building where she went. Sometimes because she had a reputation for being very kind; but mostly because she was the Deputy Chief of Staff’s assistant and there was the unwritten law of the land, make Donna unhappy, make the Deputy Chief of Staff VERY unhappy. 

“Hi.” Donna greeted the woman closest to the door. The woman looked up at Donna and arched a brow at her. Donna got the first impression that the woman wasn’t very friendly, but didn’t want to leap to conclusions in case she was just having a bad day. Truth be told, Donna herself could be less than pleasant if she was having a bad day. 

“Something I can help you with, Ms. Moss?” she asked. 

“Yes. I’m changing my address and want to make sure you have the new one. So, I came down to fill out whatever paperwork you need for that.” 

“Moving to a new apartment?” the woman asked standing up and moving to a taller desk. Donna followed her across the office. Was that any of this woman’s business? 

“Taking the bigger step with my boyfriend.” Donna replied. 

The woman paused and looked at her. “Oh.” The woman clearly looked like she disapproved and Donna was beginning to get an unsettling feeling about this whole conversation now. 

“Mr. Lyman’s address then?” she asked. 

“Yes.” Donna nodded cautiously. 

“Well, you’ll have to provide it to us because we don’t keep the personnel files down here for the senior staff anymore. Those are held in the Chief of Staff’s office.” she informed sliding a form over to Donna and putting specific emphasis on the words senior staff. 

“Yes, I’m aware of that.” Donna stated. 

“I’m sure you are.” the woman smiled with what Donna immediately recognized as a smile similar to the one she often received from Amy. 

“Okay. What’s going on here?” Donna demanded. 

“Nothing.” the woman shrugged. “I don’t usually comment on the lives of others, much less what people do in the privacy of their own homes. But, this seems a little inappropriate.” 

“I’m sorry we don’t have your blessing.” 

“Well, he IS your boss.” 

Donna paused while she contemplated a response. Should she rip this woman’s hair out for commenting on something she knew nothing about or take the high road? Turns out she didn’t have to make a decision after all. 

“He’s also YOUR boss.” came a very unhappy voice from the office doorway. 

The woman’s eyes widened in panic, and Donna turned around at the sound of Josh’s voice. She wasn’t really sure what he was doing in that part of the building, but he had a file in his hand and he walked into the office without looking at her. As soon as he walked in, Donna felt the tension in the room skyrocket. He was angry. REALLY angry. 

“Mr. Lyman.” the woman sputtered. 

“Is it somehow unclear to you that as Deputy Chief of Staff human resources falls under me and I’m your boss?” he asked. “Though, I think by the end of this conversation that might not be the case.” 

The woman’s eyes widened at the threat to her job. Donna took a step towards him. 

“Josh...” she began. He held up his hand to her and continued to glare at the woman. 

“It is not in the job description of human resources to comment on the lives of other White House employees, especially when those comments are laced with gross ignorance. Where’s the department director?” 

“He’s in a meeting, sir.” she whispered. 

“Josh, don’t fire her.” Donna pleaded. She took a step toward him and put one hand on his chest and the other on his forearm. 

“Well, he’s not in with the President or Leo, and they’re the only two people in this building that he can be in a meeting with that I WON’T pull him out of, so go get him. Now.” Josh directed and the woman hurried out of the room. 

“Josh, please don’t fire her.” Donna whispered again. He turned to look at her, and Donna could still see the anger in his eyes, but he didn’t answer her because the woman returned with a man who Donna recognized as the Director of Human Resources. 

“Hi, Josh.” the director greeted. “Sandy said you needed to see me.” 

“She transfers out of this department today.” Josh informed the director nodding towards Sandy. “Immediately. You’ll take care of the paperwork now and bring it up to me to sign off on. You can move her to OEOB or the Vice President’s office, but she is no longer an employee of this department.” 

The director gave a cautious glance at Sandy who looked petrified but relieved. The director couldn’t recall Josh ever actually getting involved in personnel issues in the near six years that they’d been there. But he also recognized Josh’s assistant standing there, who was looking very wide eyed at whatever the situation was, and something wasn’t adding up. 

“Um, well...” the director began. 

“It’s either that or I’m firing her all together.” Josh replied. “Have the paperwork to me within the hour.” Josh turned to leave the office, but stopped and turned to Donna. “Let’s go.” he ordered softly. “We’ve got stuff to do.” 

Donna gave one last look at the director and Sandy and quickly followed Josh from the office. 

“What were you doing down there anyway?” she asked, wisely waiting until they were alone to discuss what she really wanted to. 

“I was down with Joe Quincy.” he replied glancing over to her. They walked the rest of the way to the bullpen in silence, and since they knew what was coming, they walked straight into his office and closed the door. 

“You can’t do that, Donna.” he said right off the bat, putting his hands in his pockets and standing in the middle of the room. “I didn’t fire her because you asked me not to, and now it looks like that’s exactly what happened. We can’t have people think that I’m doing stuff because you’re telling me to. Leo’s going to flip out.” 

“Fine. I should have waited until she left.” Donna conceded. “But Josh, you can’t do stuff like that. You can’t fire people simply because they’re mean to me.” 

“I wasn’t just doing that.” he replied. “I was going to fire her because she works in Human Resources at the White House and she was using information on an employee against them. And yeah, actually I can fire someone for being mean to you if I wanted. This is the White House where there are security issues, and if I fire someone, I actually don’t have to provide a reason for it.” 

She sighed and moved to stand before him. She put one hand on his chest and leaned in to kiss him. He kept his hands in his pockets, mainly because he knew if he touched her now, they’d end up against the door again, but he responded to her kiss all the same. 

“I’m sorry about before.” she said. “I promise I won’t do it again.” 

“Seriously.” 

“Seriously.” 

“I hate when you make me be the boss.” 

“I know.” 

“Kay.” 

She kissed him again and he watched her as she walked out of his office and back to her desk. He stood there for a minute before returning to his desk to go back to the impossible budget proposal. 

Later that night, she had finished up what she was working on and moved to his door to see how much longer he was going to be. He was sitting at his desk, immersed in his reading, his sleeves were rolled up, his hands were on either side of his face and he had his look of concentration on his face. She leaned up against the doorway and crossed her arms in front of her chest and watched him like she’d done a 100 times before. After a few minutes, he looked up at her. 

“How long have you been standing there?” 

“Couple minutes.” 

“What are you doing?” 

“Watching you try to make the world a better place.” 

“You’re watching me read?” 

“I’m watching you think.” she moved and sat down on the other side of his desk and propped her chin up on her hand. 

“Well, I didn’t do anything good today.” he said. 

“There’s one less mean person working in Human Resources today.” 

He chuckled at her and leaned back in his chair. “I’m always amazed at how you always find the good in something I do.” She shrugged and continued to look at him. 

“How much longer?” she asked. 

“I have to brief the President on the budget in a few minutes.” he said. “Why don’t you head home? I’ll try not to be too long.” 

“Don’t get him talking about national parks.” she warned. “I’ll make dinner.” 

“I like the sound of that.” 

She stood up and walked out of the office. He did like the sound of that. She was going ‘home’ to make him dinner. Maybe the world was a better place today after all. 

TBC


	11. Two Joshes, The

Josh was stunned when an hour later he was walking through the door at home. The President, as it turned out, wasn’t really in the mood to work anymore that night, so the meeting was pretty short. Not that there was much to tell him anyway. 

He walked through the door of the apartment and immediately took in the atmosphere. The smell of dinner greeted him at the door, and there were minimal lights in the living room on. She had a CD on and he smiled when he saw her dancing in the kitchen. Her back was to him and she didn’t know he was home yet, which he took advantage of, just leaning up against the door to watch. 

These were moments when he thanked his lucky stars for their age difference. When he saw her like this, he wasn’t jaded by politics. He wasn’t exhausted after a long day. She kept him youthful and as honest as anyone was going to be able to. She reminded him that there was still good to do in the world, and there was still reasons to get up and go to work in the morning. Maybe one day when they were old, the difference in their age would be a bad thing, but tonight it was one of the many things about her that made him actually feel lucky; that along the way, he had done something good to deserve this happiness he’d found with her. 

Growing up, Donna had taken many dance and music lessons and was hard pressed to resist immersing herself in a song she liked. He’d seen her dance before when they all went out to a bar, or that one time she and CJ had dragged he and Sam to a club, but that was when she knew people were watching her. He saw the exact moment she realized he was home because her dance movements became much more seductive. Amy had rocked out one morning in her kitchen to Van Morrison, and that was amusing at the time, and slightly scary. But now Donna was here, and she was dancing for him, and that was a HUGE turn on. Josh wasn’t one to go to strip clubs, but the occasional bachelor party brought him there and there was a difference between a woman dancing for you because she was being paid to, and a woman dancing for you because she was in love. 

She had moved into the living room now and he had moved to a huge overstuffed chair in the corner. He saw that she had a glass of wine in her hand and she had changed into pajama pants and a tank top when she had gotten home. She’d washed all the make up off her face and pulled her hair up. He smiled when he studied her because she was all Donna; no traces of Donna the Senior Assistant to the Deputy Chief of Staff left. 

“I used to think about you when I heard this song.” she said softly still moving around the living room and Josh thought that those Hawaiian dancers had nothing on her. 

So here we are tonight you and me together   
The storm outside, the fire is bright   
And in your eyes I see what's on my mind   
You've got me wild, turned around inside   
And then desire, see, is creeping up heavy inside here   
And know you feel the same way I do now   
Now let's make this an evening   
Lovers for a night, lovers for tonight   
Stay here with me, love, tonight just for an evening   
When we make our passion pictures, you and me twist up, secret creatures   
And we'll stay here, tomorrow go back to being friends 

“You used to think about me when you heard a song about a one night stand?”   
She shrugged and moved closer to him. “There was a time when that would have been all I needed and I would have died a happy woman.” 

Go back to being friends, but tonight let's be lovers,   
We kiss and sweat, we'll turn this better thing to the best of all we can offer,   
Just a rogue kiss, tangled tongues and lips,   
See me this way I'm turning and turning for you, Girl just tonight float away here with me   
An evening just wait and see   
But tomorrow go back to your man, I'm back to my world   
And we're back to being friends   
Wait and see me, tonight let's do this thing   
All we are is wasting hours until the sun comes up it's all ours   
On our way here tomorrow go back to being friends   
Go back to being friends, tonight let's be lovers, say you will, and hear me call, soft-spoken whispering love 

“That would never have been enough for me.” he said.   
“Well, now that I’ve gotten my hands on you, it clearly wouldn’t have been enough for me either.” She straddled his lap on the chair and his arms came around her as she began a pretty impressive lap dance. “But before I knew how truly amazing you are, I thought it would be.” 

A thing or two I have to say here, tonight let's go all the way then   
Love I'll see you, just for this evening, let's strip down, trip out at this, one evening starts with a kiss; Run away   
And tomorrow back to being friends   
Lovers...love...lovers Just for tonight, one night...love you And tomorrow say goodbye 

“But there was a time that I would have given anything for just one night with you.” she said softly. 

“Me too.” 

“But now it doesn’t have to be that way.” 

“Hell no.” 

She slid her hands up his chest and began to undress him. 

“What about dinner?” he asked as he brought his hands under her shirt and up her back. 

“It’s got a little while yet.” 

“Are you telling me I get a happy ending to my lap dance?” he smirked. 

“You get a happy ending to a long day.” she said kissing his now bare chest as she worked him out of his pants. 

“You spoil me.” he said. 

She shrugged again. “I’ve waited a long time to spoil you.” 

“It’s nice.” 

“Good.” 

“Even though I was a jerk today.” 

“My boss might have been a bit a jerk, but not my boyfriend.” 

“I don’t think there was a difference today.” 

“Maybe there wasn’t today, but I was bad too.” 

“So we’re even?” 

“We’re even.” 

He pulled her tank top over her head and started kissing her neck. Then he slowly moved them from the chair to the floor. 

“You don’t think you’d be more comfortable on the couch?” she asked huskily. 

“I’m comfortable anywhere you are.” 

“I love the nice things you say to me now.” 

“I’ve always said nice things to you.” 

“But now you say REALLY nice things to me.” 

“I can’t help it; I love you.” he said working her pants down her legs. 

“That’s my favorite nice thing you say to me.” 

“It’s true.” he ran his hand lightly up her body and she sighed. “I thought I was never going to get to tell you that.” 

“I think I’ve known for a while.” she said as he dropped his mouth to her breasts. 

“How?” 

“I told you, I’m tuned to you.” she smiled. 

“Then why didn’t you tell me?” 

“Tell you that you loved me?” she laughed. 

“Yeah.” 

“You don’t always need to be hit over the head.” 

“I thought I was going to stop breathing the first time you said it to me.” 

She smiled as she ran her hands over his naked chest, then slid his pants off. “That wasn’t the first time I said it to you.” 

“I know.” he nodded. 

“You do?” she asked incredulously. She said it in the hospital to him when she thought he was unconscious. He’d gotten an infection in the hospital and they had a hard time controlling his fever for a little while and by that time, she was just too drained and too tired to guard herself anymore and she had told him. 

“I heard you.” he said softly. “I couldn’t really open my eyes at the time. I thought I was just delirious.” 

“I thought you were delirious, too.” she mumbled sheepishly. 

“It practically broke my heart that you had to tell me when you thought I couldn’t hear you.” 

“You’re going to make me cry, Josh.” 

“Well, I don’t want to do that.” he said. “If you start crying, I’ll have to comfort you, and that will mean I’ll have to stop making love to you, and I don’t particularly want to do that.” 

“You’re telling me I can’t get emotional right now?” 

“I am.” 

“Okay. I’ll try to control myself then. But this is the only time that’s going to work.” 

“I’m fine with that.” 

TBC


	12. Two Joshes, The

“Josh?” 

“Mr. President!” Josh jumped out of his chair when he saw the President standing in his office doorway. 

“You’re here late.” 

“Yes, sir.” 

“Donna’s not still here, is she?” 

“No, sir. I sent her home a couple of hours ago. I was just prepping for my meeting with Congressman Walker in the morning.” 

“I’m going to have Toby handle that.” the President said walking a few steps into the office. 

“Sir?” 

“There’s something else I need you to do tomorrow.” 

“Okay.” 

Josh was more than a little curious. He’d been prepping for this meeting for hours. Donna did, like, a billion index cards. It was one o’clock in the morning, and now the President was giving it to Toby? What the hell was going on, and why didn’t he find out about this, oh, like six hours ago? 

“CJ’s flying up to the farm tomorrow to talk to Zoe about doing an interview. I want you to go with her.” the President explained. 

Well now THAT’S not something Josh heard everyday. The President wanted HIM to help CJ with an interview prep? Josh? Josh, who has been all but banned from the pressroom; Josh who is the usually the last person they put on t.v. because after he makes mincemeat of his opposition, he usually goes a step further and just all out insults them? Now the President wanted him to help with an interview? 

“You want me to help CJ with the interview?” Josh asked thoroughly confused. 

“God no!” the President immediately rejected. “I may be getting old, Josh, but I’m not losing my mind!” 

“Okay, then why am I going up there?” 

“Zoe asked for you.” the President said quietly. 

“Oh. Did she say why?” 

“No.” the President sighed. “I asked why she couldn’t just pick up the damn phone, rather than haul my Deputy Chief of Staff up there in the middle of the week, but she just said she wanted to see you.” 

“Well, all right then, sir.” Josh said. 

“CJ’s flying up in the morning and back in the afternoon. Debbie’s already booked you on the flight. Go on home and get some sleep. It’s a 9 a.m. flight.” 

“Well, I think I have to brief Toby now.” 

“Toby will push the meeting to the afternoon, and you can do that by phone in the morning.” 

“Yes, sir.” Josh was never one to argue with the President when it came to going home. 

The President walked through the corridors with Josh until he turned off head to the Residence and Josh left through the lobby. As he headed home, Josh wondered what it was that Zoe wanted to talk to him about that she couldn’t talk to him about over the phone. Not that he had a problem going up to New Hampshire to see her the next day. It wasn’t the same around there without her randomly popping in to give him a hard time. Her presence was missed by everybody. The President seemed sad; Charlie was downright miserable, and the First Lady wasn’t around either. Nothing felt right in the building. 

He walked into the darkened apartment, peeling off his clothes on his way through the living room. He slid into bed next to Donna and she rolled over and snuggled in close. 

“What time is it?” she murmured. 

“About quarter to two.” 

“A whopping four hours of sleep tonight.” 

“I can sleep on the plane.” 

“What plane?” 

“President’s sending me to New Hampshire with CJ tomorrow. Toby’s doing the thing.” 

“Why on Earth does he want you to help CJ?” 

“He doesn’t.” Josh laughed. “In fact, I thought he was going to have a stroke for a second when I asked him that. Zoe wanted to know if I’d come up. She wants to talk to me about something.” 

“Oh.” said Donna. If she was surprised by the request, she didn’t show it. “Well, tell her I said hello and we miss her.” 

“Kay.” 

“Toby better not give me shit about my index cards.” It was the last thing he heard before he dropped off to sleep. 

When he and CJ arrived at the farm the next morning, CJ sat with Zoe and Mrs. Bartlet first about the interview, while Josh poked around inside the house and talked to Toby about Walker. He was just hanging up the phone when CJ and Mrs. Bartlet came in. 

“It’s all you, mi amore.” CJ announced. Instead of heading out onto the porch where CJ and Mrs. Bartlet just were, Josh went into the kitchen opened the up the fridge and found some beer. He grabbed two bottles and smiling slightly at the First Lady’s arched brow, walked out onto the porch. Zoe was on the porch swing down at the end. He handed her a beer and dropped down next to her pushing the swing back and forth. 

“Well, now THIS is something new for us.” She smiled taking a sip. 

“You’re over 21 now.” he replied. 

“It’s not even noon yet.” 

“It’s noon somewhere in the world.” 

“You and Donna always share your beer.” 

“That’s because that was one of the few things we could do that gave us some kind of connection.” 

“So, it’s about time you and Donna finally wised up.” 

“You dragged my ass up here to talk about Donna?” Josh countered 

“No. But I’m going to pry into that first since I have you here.” 

“She says hello and she misses you.” 

“I miss her too.” 

“Everyone misses you down there.” he continued hesitantly. 

“Talk to Warden Abbey.” Zoe said rolling her eyes. 

“She was a lunatic when you were missing, Zoe.” Josh said. “They both were.” 

“But YOU seemed to find some comfort.” she smiled again. 

“Back to Donna again?” 

“I haven’t seen you. I have to make up for the teasing.” 

“You really don’t.” 

“I broke up with Jean Paul.” 

“Well...good.” 

“Really? You think that was a good idea?” 

“Well, nobody likes him.” 

“You and Charlie don’t like him.” she said with a roll of her eyes. 

“Zoe! You told him you didn’t want to do ecstacy and he slipped it into your drink!” Josh exclaimed. “Yeah, I can’t imagine why I don’t like him. French royalty, or whatever he claims to be, or not, if I ever see him again, I’m going to kick his ass.” 

“Yeah, you’re a real tough guy.” she scoffed. 

“Put him in front of me and see what happens.” 

“You’re a lover, not a fighter.” 

“And we’re back to Donna again.” 

“See how I did that?” 

“Your cleverness continues to astound me.” 

They swung in silence for a few minutes, taking sips of their beers and looking out across the field. Every now and then, Josh saw Abbey or CJ poke their face through the window curtain. It must be driving them totally crazy to be in there and not know what he and Zoe were talking about. Truth be told, Josh still didn’t know what he and Zoe were talking about. 

“I don’t remember much of what happened.” she said quietly. 

“That’s a good thing.” 

“Apparently, it’s not.” she replied. “Apparently it’s bad to suppress things.” 

“Well, I think it’s better when you forget. Speaking from experience, it’s sometimes bad when you remember, too.” 

“I think if I wasn’t so drugged and drunk, I might have been able to fight.” 

“I’m okay with blaming this all on Frenchie.” 

“You sound like Charlie.” 

“That’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.” She smacked him in the arm and he was surprised when she put her head on his shoulder. “If you fought, they might have hurt you more.” 

“I was terrified.” 

“You looked it.” 

“How do you know?” 

“The ransom note came to our fax machine.” 

“Oh.” 

“Yeah, Donna got it.” 

“Well, it’s nice to know that it’s being used for more important things than your fan mail.” 

“Ha, ha. Now you sound like Donna.” 

“That’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.” She was quiet for a few moments before she continued. “So, you don’t think it’s my fault?” 

“I absolutely do not.” 

“Do you think it’s my dad’s?” 

“First of all, Zoe,” Josh began. “you’re forgetting the cardinal rule here. There’s a difference between your dad and the President of the United States.” 

“So you think it’s his fault because of that thing with what’s his name?” 

“Shareef?” 

“Yeah.” 

“I can’t imagine that was an easy decision to make.” Josh said quietly. “He meets the man, and then he’s got to order him killed?” 

“It probably wasn’t.” 

“Honestly, Zoe, I think if it was in retaliation for that, you’d be dead right now.” 

“Don’t sugar coat it on my account!” she said with a small laugh. 

“Did you want me to?” 

“No. I want you to be honest.” 

“That’s me being honest.” 

“You think I should come back?” she asked. 

“I think you can’t hide forever.” he replied. “Much as we’d all like for you to stay up here and know you’re safe, yeah, I think you should go back.” 

She fell silent and he continued to rock. After a few minutes, he realized that she had fallen asleep. Abbey came out and sat in a wicker chair across from them. 

“Have a nice chat?” she asked quietly. 

“We always do.” he smiled. “Though I’m not sure what good I was to her.” 

“It’s just you, Josh.” Abbey shrugged. “She wanted to see her big brother. You guys used to talk a lot during the campaigns. I think she values your opinion.” 

“At least somebody in this family does.” he joked. 

“Don’t ruin the moment by being a jackass.” Abbey retorted. “Jed’s always had a soft spot for you, even when you screw up. You’re different from the others, Josh.” 

“And you, ma’am?” 

“I’m not entirely indifferent to you.” she shrugged. 

“That’s good to know.” 

“It’s really Donna I like.” 

“Well, that’s what everybody says.” 

“I’m thinking about stealing her away from you.” 

“That would entail coming back to the White House.” 

“Are you challenging me?” Abbey said. 

“Not if it means you’re going to come back and try and steal my assistant out from under me.” 

“Was that literally?” 

“You’re going to torture me now, too?” 

“You’re trapped here for the moment. I might as well make the best of it.” Josh laughed and finished off his beer. “Seriously though, Josh. Thanks for coming up here. I think it meant a lot.” 

Abbey stood up and went back inside the house. Josh stayed out in the porch and continued to rock the swing as Zoe slept on his shoulder. He still wasn’t sure what his purpose here was, but if it made Zoe feel even a smidgeon better, then it was worth it. 

TBC


	13. Two Joshes, The

“You wanted to see me, Leo?” Josh asked entering the Chief of Staff’s office. 

“Yeah. I want you to take Donna with you tomorrow when you meet with Phillips.” Leo said not looking up at him. If he had, he would have seen Josh’s expression of total confusion. 

“Why?” 

“I need a reason?” 

“She’s never come with me before.” 

“You don’t want to take advantage of the opportunity to have a nice long lunch with your girlfriend?” 

“Just her, me and Congressman Phillips?” Josh replied. 

“You said she wants to take on more responsibility.” Leo reminded. “I agree. She’s smart, I think she’ll benefit us in other things, but we need to get her there first.” 

Josh watched his mentor warily. This still seemed off to him. Yes, he wanted to help her take on more, but this seemed like an odd meeting to start with. The congressman was jumping ship and voting the other way on the education package and so Josh was going to have to go and get him back in line. That wasn’t really the kind of stuff Donna was interested in dealing with. A thought struck him and he took a curious step closer to Leo’s desk. 

“Does this have anything to do with the fact that Brett Phillips asked her out to dinner over the winter?” 

“That’s an added benefit.” Leo replied. 

“She’s just coming so she can sit there and look pretty and smile and he’ll vote our way.” Josh countered. 

“I would never tell her to do something like that.” 

“And neither will I.” 

Josh was amazed. This was wrong on many levels. How was this fair to either he or Donna? Not to mention this seemed dangerously close to sexual harassment. Go to lunch and sit there and look pretty, though Leo hadn’t actually admitted to it, he seemed to be hiding behind the growing in her job excuse. True, she could learn something, but Josh didn’t really see that as the point. 

“Josh?” Leo asked. 

He rubbed a hand over his face and looked at Leo for a long moment. “Fine.” he acquiesced and walked out. He didn’t care if he Leo wasn’t done with him He walked back into the bullpen and she looked up when she saw him come in. As had become a habit of his, he nodded his head toward his office and she stood up and followed him. She closed the door behind her and looked at him expectantly. 

“Leo wants you to come with me tomorrow to meet with Phillips.” he said. 

“Why?” 

“He says it’s the first step towards you learning more and taking on more.” 

“But you have a problem with that?” 

“No. I’m more of the opinion that he wants you to come with me because Brett Phillips asked you out a few months ago, and he thinks your being there will help sway him.” 

“He said that?” 

“No. That would violate quite a few workplace laws.” 

“Ah.” she said then shrugged. “Screw it then, he’s probably right.” 

“Donna.” 

“No, Josh, he probably is right.” Donna continued. “I don’t have to flirt with him, you’re not going to leave me alone with him. I just have to show up and have lunch with my boyfriend. So, fine. I’ll do this for him, he’ll do something for me.” 

“Then why I am the one feeling like the dirty boss?” he muttered. 

“Because Phillips is going to be spending more time smiling at me than listening to you.” 

“I’m having Carol call your cell phone half way through, and you’re coming back here.” he relented. “I’m not going to help some pig congressman try and look down your shirt for two hours.” 

“I doubt he’ll be all that obvious with you there.” Donna laughed. “Did you forget our stint on C-SPAN not too long ago?” 

He looked over at her clearly unamused and uncomfortable with the whole situation. True, Leo didn’t out and out ask him to take Donna with him so she could smile at the congressman and get his vote. He supposed he could come up with a reason not to bring her. Leo really couldn’t get mad if he did. 

Donna smiled as she watched his inner battle. She moved over to him and wrapped her arms around his neck and leaned her head against Josh’s chest and sighed as his arms came around her, reveling in the way his embrace could make her feel protected and loved. 

Everything was still so new to them; they were still making intimate discoveries about each other. He loved to hear how her breath caught in her chest when he touched her lightly as he passed by her desk; the way his name sounded on her lips now, even in casual conversation; the way she looked at him with unfailing confidence in him. Her words were no longer guarded; she no longer said things where he had to try to decipher the real meaning of her words. 

He discovered that having Donnatella Moss love him came with an innate sense of peace. She was more than in tune to him; she was his other half. She anticipated his needs in all things and met them before he even knew what he needed. He only hoped that he was half the lover she was. She possessed him, mind, body, and soul, and he was perfectly content to allow her do with him as she pleased. Most men shy away from women like that; women who are possessive, and seek to control. But not Josh. Donna was pure and genuine and always had his best interests at heart. She inspired him to try harder; she’d always done that. 

As for Donna, she’d discovered that when Josh Lyman bears his heart, he bears his soul, as well. She’d discovered that his ego masked insecurities. The demons from Rosslyn had not completely gone away. She thought that she had been in love in Wisconsin. She thought that she left that love behind and drove to New Hampshire heartbroken. How naive she had been. Heartbreak was watching as he battled a nightmare; heartbreak was seeing him discover something that couldn’t be fixed; heartbreak was seeing a moment of Josh’s helplessness. When he looked at her, she knew he told the truth when he said he’d never been in love before. When he looked at her, he made her feel alive, sexy and worshiped; and when he worshiped her, he made her feel cherished. She had never known that she could be loved with such intensity; or that she could love with such intensity. 

She was surprised at how protective she was of him. Had she always been that way? It had always been part of her job to shield him from certain things, but she found herself constantly quelling the instinct to quash anything that might upset him. She loved him, yes; but when had she become downright obsessive? 

“No skirts tomorrow.” he ordered into her shoulder and she giggled in response. “I’m serious. And wear a turtleneck, too. I’ll be damned if he gets to see your neck, too.” 

“That means you won’t get to see my neck tomorrow either.” 

“You can change when you get back here.” 

“You’re incorrigible, Joshua.” she smiled. “You’re also acting like you’re 16.” 

“Oh, no I’m not. The 16 year old version of me liked to show off my hot girlfriend.” 

“Pig.” 

“Well, yeah. The 16 year old version of me was quite piggish.” 

“Piggish is a word now?” 

“It’s not the act of being a pig?” 

“Ish would suggest a semi-pig.” 

“This conversation has gotten away from us now.” 

“Not the first time.” 

“Won’t be the last.” 

“I’m going back to work now.” 

“I’m going to stay in here and think piggish things about you.” he smirked. She rolled her eyes and smiled before disappearing back out into the bullpen. 

TBC


	14. Two Joshes, The

Josh eyed the bottle of wine on the table next to the bed. It was nearly gone and he hadn’t had a drop. He held tightly to Donna as she sat across his lap and cried into his chest. She’d walked through the door when they got home, uncorked the bottle of pinot, sat down on the bed, and proceeded to get completely drunk. He thought about telling her to slow down and reminding her that she had to work tomorrow, regardless of how hungover she was, but he decided against it. He wasn’t one to advocate getting loaded, but she seemed to have needed it. She’d pretty much been unhinged since before the State of Union when she got the phone call about Donovan Morrisey. She went tearing out of the White House, and though he followed her, there was little he could do to comfort her. 

“I’m so sorry.” she said wiping her eyes. “I don’t know what’s the matter with me.” 

“I told you, it’s okay.” 

“I blame you.” 

“For Donovan Morrisey’s death?” 

“No! For giving me that stupid project. I changed my mind. I don’t want to do more.” 

“If I knew it was going to affect you like this I never would have done it. And you do want to do more. And you should.” 

“They wouldn’t have gotten to YOU like this.” 

“I’m not sure, it’s that a compliment?” he smiled. 

“You’d think by now I would learn to not let these things get to me.” 

“I told you before, I’m glad you’re still the type of person that this stuff gets to. It’s sad. You saw people, I just saw clemency pleas.” 

“But he didn’t get it because his parents are campaign contributors. He didn’t get it because his parents believe in the President.” 

“He also didn’t need to kill himself over it, Donna.” Josh reminded. “Leo said they’d revisit his case in the spring. He didn’t want to wait that long. He committed a federal crime. Mandatory minimums suck, but they are what they are for the moment.” She wiped her eyes and wrapped her arms around him tightly. 

“Lay down on your stomach.” he said. Without even asking why, she did as she was told. Josh straddled over her and began to massage her shoulders and smiled when she groaned her approval. “That’s really nice.” 

“You’re really tense.” he noted with a frown. “You’ve had a rough week.” 

“And you haven’t?” 

“It wasn’t any more or less rough than it normally is.” he said with a shrug she couldn’t see. 

“It was the State of Union.” 

“Which is why it was rough on Toby.” 

She fell silent for a while while he continued to move down her back. She was extremely tense and he cursed himself for being the cause of it. She had said she didn’t want to be involved with the pardons anymore, and he brushed it off. But she was doing a good job, as usual, and other than an occasional gripe, she just continued to work on it. 

“Feeling better?” he asked softly. 

“Mmmm...you have magic hands.” 

“Is that so?” he laughed. 

“I’ve always thought so.” 

“Always?” 

“Mmm-hmm.” Donna paused before continuing. “She was so passionate, Josh.” 

“Mrs. Kaehler?” 

“Yeah.” 

“She was a desperate mother fighting for her son. I would imagine she would be.” 

“I wonder if I’ll ever be like that.” 

“You are now.” 

“I’m not so sure about that.” He felt her start to turn over, so he raised himself up, so she could move onto her back. When she was settled, he settled back down straddling her and looking down at her. 

“You absolutely get passionate when you’re fighting for me.” 

She smiled up at him. Her head had started to clear from the effects from the wine. 

“If I get passionate when I’m fighting for you, what do you get when you’re fighting for me?” 

“It depends on why I’m fighting.” he said softly. “I can get passionate, protective, tunnel visioned, vengeful. I don’t usually stop to think things through first.” 

“She *was* desperate, Josh.” Donna whispered. “She drove here from Colorado to get on her knees and beg the President. I just wonder if I would have done any less.” 

“Well, I think if it was our kid, since you work at the White House, you’d probably just barge into the Oval Office and demand the President pardon him.” 

“Well, I don’t think we’d really be allowed to work at the White House if we had a kid that was in federal prison, but I like the sound of `our kid.’” 

“Me too.” 

He was surprised at how much he liked the sound of that. He never thought he’d love anything more than politics, but then he met Donna. He never thought he’d love a woman enough to want to live with her and be with her every minute of the day, but then he kissed Donna. He wasn’t sure he had ever envisioned himself as a father, but then Donna started talking about a passionate mother and her cause, and he knew she’d be a wonderful mother. And since he’d decided long ago that he’d marry her one day, he was the only possible father of any of her children. 

This actually wasn’t the first time he’d thought about having kids with Donna. It first occurred to him when he was flying back from New Hampshire after talking to Zoe. He had thought, and not for the first time, that the President was a better man than he. He had been concerned when the President removed himself temporarily. But then he had thought that it must have been a fantastic testament to the man’s strengths to stand in the situation room, with an Army at his disposal, and not blow the hell out of something to get her back; to not use every last resource possible; and then to step aside and let someone else handle it; someone who would look only at the bigger picture and not necessarily at the fate of Zoe Bartlet. Josh wasn’t sure he was strong enough to do that. 

“Dare I ask if you’re planning on having this kid out of wedlock?” 

“No.” 

“No I shouldn’t ask?” 

“No, I’m not planning on having this kid out of wedlock.” 

“So, you’re going to make an honest woman out of me.” 

“I don’t think they get more honest than you, but yes.” 

“Then this is probably a bigger conversation than this.” 

“It certainly sounds it.” 

“One that we shouldn’t have when I’m sobering up.” 

“We could just skip to the end.” 

“We should go through the steps. There’s a lot of important stuff in there.” 

“Are you saying you might not say yes?” 

“Hell no! I’m saying yes.” she answered immediately and he chuckled at her adamance. “I’m just saying that there’s a lot in there to talk about first so we’re not surprised.” 

“Kay.” 

“Really?” 

“If you want to have the conversation, we’ll have it.” 

“But not while I’m sobering up. I want to remember everything you promise me.” 

“You want me to promise you more than to love you with every fiber of my being until the day I die?” 

“Yes.” 

“I see.” he said. “This is a larger conversation.” 

“This is what I’m saying.” 

“Okay. I promise to love every one of our six children with every fiber of my being, too.” 

“See, I wasn’t thinking six.” 

“Neither was I; I just wanted to freak you out.” 

She smacked his thigh playfully and he dropped down next to her. She turned on her side to face him. This was a rather odd way for this subject to come up, but then again, important things for them usually did come up in odd ways. 

“I’m serious, Donna.” he said as he faced her. “I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” 

“Good. Then people won’t find it odd that I’m following you around for the rest of my life.” 

“I thought you’d walk beside me, instead of behind me.” 

“Then we wouldn’t be the behind every successful man cliche.” 

“I’m fine with that.” 

“Yeah?” 

“I’d rather we just be us.” 

TBC


	15. Two Joshes, The

“I still don’t understand why you want to send me to the Middle East. You’re going to have Fitzwallace there.” Donna said 

“I don’t want to send you anywhere.” said Josh. “I have absolutely no idea what the hell I’m going to do while you’re gone. But you said you wanted to grow in your job. Leo suggested this.” 

Donna flopped down on the couch. “But I don’t want to leave you.” 

“You’re only going to be in Gaza for like a week.” Josh said. “I’ll miss you like crazy, but it’s not going to be *that* long.” 

“CJ said you bumped the press guy for me.” Donna said. “Is that true?” 

“It’s possible I pulled rank there.” 

“What exactly am I supposed to do on this trip?” 

“Exactly what I told you to do. Toby and I can’t craft a message on it, if we have no idea what’s going on. Plus, you’ll have to help with the press stuff.” 

“CJ seemed a little pissed by it.” 

“Again, I outrank CJ.” Josh reminded. 

“It’s going to be hot there.” Donna said. “I was reading the information on it. It’s going to be over 100 degrees during the day.” 

“Well, yeah.” Josh laughed. “It’s a desert. Besides, it’s almost June. It’s not like it’s nice and crisp here.” 

“I guess.” she nodded looking down. 

“You alright?” he asked. She took note of the concern in his voice and looked back up at him and smiled and nodded. “You don’t have to go if you don’t want it.” 

“No, I definitely want to.” she assured quickly. “It’s just...I’m going to miss you. I’m going to be half a world away, and you’re going to be here...unsupervised.” 

“Yes. There’s no telling what trouble I’m going to get into while you’re gone. I imagine it’ll be a record setting week for me.” 

“What *are* you going to do?” 

“Hell if I know. I’ve still got a week to figure it out.” 

“Don’t scare away the temp, Josh.” 

“I will be pure sunshine all week.” 

“Why do I have a hard time believing that?” 

“The President and Leo aren’t wild about this trip, Donna.” Josh said. “Fitz is going to make sure that Andi and her cronies don’t promise anything. Toby and I want to know everything they talk about.” She nodded to him and he stretched out on the couch next to her. “Did I tell you how incredible you looked tonight?” 

“A few times.” she smiled. 

“It’s worth repeating.” 

“What’s Nancy’s new deputy like?” 

“Serious.” 

“You’re not impressed.” 

“Oh, she’s got a pretty impressive resume. But she doesn’t think I’m funny.” 

“No? She wasn’t won over by your obvious charm?” she asked innocently. 

“You mock, but you find me charming.” he replied as he started kissing her neck. 

“I find you very charming.” 

“Just charming?” he moved along to her collarbone and she began to find it hard to concentrate. 

“No, you’re sexy as hell, too.” 

“Maybe that’s how I’ll win over the temp.” 

“I would rather her not see that side of you.” 

“So that puts me back to the scaring thing.” 

“Hmm...a classic conundrum. You’ll have to scare her then.” 

“She’ll think you’re crazy for loving me.” 

“I’m okay with that.” 

******* 

“I’m leaving for Dover in a couple of minutes.” Donna announced coming into his office. It was 7 a.m. on the morning she was leaving, and they’d come into the office to grab her laptop to take with her on the trip. 

Josh had been quiet and withdrawn since the night before and Donna could tell something was bugging him, only every time she asked him about it, he said it was nothing. He came around his desk and stood in front of her, looking down at the floor and shuffling his feet. Donna took in his mood and sighed. 

“Are you really going to make me pull this out of you this morning?” she asked quietly. She moved over to him and put a hand on his upper arm, lightly stroking up and down. Normally, if it looked like there were going to have any kind of intimate contact she’d close his door, but it was pretty early, and the bullpen was mostly deserted. “Josh?” she hedged again quietly when he didn’t answer. 

“I don’t want you to go.” he said softly and she smiled. 

“It was your idea.” she reminded. 

“I know; I changed my mind.” 

“Josh.” 

“This is why I didn’t tell you. I’m feeling a little selfish.” 

“I’m only going to be gone for a week.” she replied. 

“To one of the most dangerous places on the planet.” Josh said. 

“I’m traveling with four members of Congress and Admiral Fitzwallace.” Donna supplied. “We’re going to have pretty tight security.” 

“Still.” 

She brought a hand up to his cheek and lightly stroked his face with her thumb. When he met her eyes, she about lost all composure. This was one of those moments when he was completely unguarded. Despite it being his idea, her taking this trip really wasn’t sitting well with him. He’d been okay with it at first, but as the past week went on, he was having doubts. It was a very unstable region. An American delegation was a pretty nice target. Leo assured him that they were traveling with extra security, but Josh still couldn’t shake the bad feeling he had. 

Then there was just the thought of being apart from her for a week. A week of not being able to hold her at night and a week of not being able to wake up to her smile in the morning. A week of no banter and no kissing, no touching and no one to go home to at night. Once he thought about what being apart from her for a week meant, he got more and more depressed. He couldn’t even hide it anymore, that’s how much it was consuming him. He knew he’d feel marginally better by simply pulling her off the trip. But she was excited about going, even if she did have to do some press stuff, which he knew she hated. She was excited to learn about the region and the culture and that he and Leo trusted her enough to send her. She’d be extremely disappointed if he made her stay and he knew his selfishness would never be worth the look of sheer disappointment in him she’d be sure to give him. 

And so he stood here now trying to keep it together while they said goodbye. It was, after all, only a week; seven measly days; 168 hours. He looked forward to that night when he could go home and go to sleep. If he couldn’t see her, maybe he could at least dream about her and it would be enough to get him by. 

“Hey.” she said softly. She saw the inner battle he was waging and smiled sadly. “I love you.” 

He wrapped his arm around the back of her neck and pulled her into a kiss, completely paying no mind to the fact that the office door remained open. Donna melted into him and met the kiss with the same love and desperation he was bringing. 

He wrapped his arms tightly around her. “I love you, too.” he whispered. “Please, please, please be safe.” 

Donna broke apart, and with one last warm smile, turned and walked out of his office. 

TBC


	16. Two Joshes, The

CJ slammed the phone down in her office. This isn’t happening, she thought as she quickly walked down the corridor towards his office. This isn’t happening to them. Couldn’t these two get a fucking break already? He had heard the commotion in the hall and was already heading over to her. He could tell something was very wrong. She watched the life leave from his eyes as she told him. “Donna?” he asked quietly. She didn’t know. 

The bullpen was a mad house. Everyone was on phones trying to get through to anyone. Nobody could get news. How come frigging MSNBC knew more than the god damn White House? Finally, Andi reached Toby on her cell phone. 

“Donna was in the other car. Andi just saw people being put in ambulances. That’s all she knows.” 

Josh looked up to the t.v.s in the bullpen and he felt CJ’s hand on his arm. He looked at the t.v. for a few moments, they showed the footage of the overturned Suburban. Was she in it when this video was taken? Was she dead in there right now on CNN? Was he now standing in the bullpen and watching her from half a world away die right in front of him? How could anyone survive that? Was she sitting in the front or the back? Did she have her seatbelt on? Oh God, please let her have been wearing her seatbelt. Was she scared right now? Was she even conscious? Suddenly, it became too overwhelming for him. He turned, bolted to his office, slammed the door and threw up into the garbage can. CJ silently slipped in, closing the door softly behind her. When he stood up, she hugged him and he started to cry. 

“I did this.” he sobbed hollowly into her shoulder. 

“Shut up. This isn’t your fault. Andi said that she saw her put into an ambulance.” 

“That only means she was alive when they dragged her out of the car, CJ. Did you see that car? Do you think anybody’s going to survive that? It was flat! I sent her there, and she got blown up! She’s blown up on fucking CNN!” 

“Don’t do this to yourself, Josh.” CJ pleaded. “They’ve never attacked Americans there before. You couldn’t have predicted it.” 

Toby barged into the office without knocking, holding out his cell phone for Josh. “Andi’s got news,” he said. 

******************************** 

Leo was letting him go to her. He had grabbed his backpack and laptop out of his office and was leaving the White House when he saw CJ in the lobby. She was walking towards him carrying her purse and turning on her cell phone. 

“Where are you going?” he asked her. 

“With you, mi amore.” she said. 

“CJ, we both can’t go to Germany.” Josh said. He stopped walking and looked at her. They were wasting time. Every minute he stayed here was a minute that he didn’t have answers. It was a minute that she was stuck over there alone and hurt. It was a minute that she might be closer to death. What if she didn’t make it? What if she died and he was a minute late getting there? 

“No, I’m driving you to the airport. You’re not driving in this head space. Margaret’s booking you a ticket. I’ll be back before the next briefing.” Josh shrugged in acceptance and they walked out of the lobby and outside towards CJ’s car. 

“We’ll swing by your place so you can pack.” CJ said as they began to walk again. 

“No. Just get to the airport.” Josh refused. “There’s nothing I need at home.” Go home?! Was CJ insane? That would add at least 45 minutes to his time? And what if that 45 minutes caused him to miss the next flight to Germany and he had to wait hours for the next one? His minute just became hours. Didn’t CJ see he needed to BE THERE! He didn’t need a toothbrush; he didn’t need clothes; he didn’t need his shaving kit. He needed to see Donna! 

“You’re going to fly to Germany and be there for God knows how long with just what you’re wearing?” CJ asked incredulously. 

“I can’t take that kind of time, CJ.” he bit back harshly. “She may not HAVE that kind of time. If she’s not going to make it, I need to be there; and if she is going to make it, I need to be there when she wakes up. I don’t need my fucking toothbrush; I need to be with Donna!” 

“Okay. We’ll go right to National then.” CJ quickly acquiesced; anything to keep him from having another nutty. God, she had never seen anything like that, especially from him. Oh, there was the infamous day he freaked out in the Oval Office, but this was a man coming apart at the seams because the woman he loved was across the world and possibly dying. She’ll never forget the look in his eyes when he ranted about killing the people responsible for this. She was afraid in those moments that they’d lost him, and the only person who could get him back was in Germany having potentially significant bleeding issues. 

“Thank you.” he said quietly. 

“She’s going to kick your ass for flying all the way to Germany.” CJ smiled. She tried to keep her voice optimistic. 

“I hope so.” Josh said quietly. 

*********************************

She was so still. As he watched her, the only movement she made was the steady rise and fall of her chest. Beyond that, she didn’t so much as twitch. The doctor said she was going to be all right, but he wouldn’t believe it until she opened her eyes and told him herself. He’d been sitting by her bed and stroking her hand for an hour now. Is this how she felt when she sat by his bedside? Did he cause her this agony that night three years ago? God, how did she endure it? He wanted to shake her and yell at her to wake up. But she continued to lay there peacefully, almost too peacefully. 

The image of the overturned Suburban was burned into his mind. Then he began to imagine what it looked like when it was flipping over. He was making himself crazy, but he couldn’t stop. If she would just open her eyes, he could start to breathe again. He’d have the sight of her beautiful blue eyes burned into his brain instead of the death and destruction that was there now. But as the hours drew on, she continued to lay there. And so he continued to wait. 

The nurses asked if he needed anything and he thought back to his earlier tirade with CJ. Yes, he did need something. He needed Donna to wake up. He needed her to wake up and yell at him for not bringing anything with him; he needed her wake up so he can apologize for sending her to hell; he needed her to wake up so his heart could beat. Was this really the way fate worked? He tells her he loves her and she gets blown up? He’d had a bad feeling about this trip and he didn’t want her to go. He should have canceled it for her. He was her boss. If he said she had to stay, she’d have to stay, and she’d be okay right now, incredibly pissed off at him, but okay. 

But he couldn’t bring himself to do that to her. He knew that she was a little nervous about the trip, but she was excited at the responsibility of it. He had given her wings and he had to let her fly. He would have be begging her not to be mad, but instead he was going to beg her forgiveness. And she was here now, broken in a hospital bed in Germany, not waking up. If she was going to be okay, why wasn’t she waking up? 

His cell phone rang a few times while he sat there, and he ignored it. He assumed that it was the White House looking for an update, but he didn’t want to talk to anyone. He wanted to sit here and feel sad and guilty. He didn’t want to be cheered up. The only person that could do that was lying unconscious in front of him. He didn’t want to tell them that she was laying here with a metal rod in her leg and cuts all over her face where the glass shattered all over her, and the bruises...God, they were everywhere. He didn’t want to tell that to anyone at the White House. He didn’t want them to ask his opinion on retaliation. He didn’t want to hear about opportunities and proportional responses. If he never set foot in that fucking building again, it’d be too soon. He would have resigned before he walked out the door if he thought he had the time. 

He had no idea how long he’d been here at that point, or even awake for that matter. He wouldn’t close his eyes until she opened hers. He hadn’t moved from this chair since the doctor had brought him in, and he’d stay here until she woke up. He wouldn’t let her wake up alone. And he’d wait as long as it took. 

TBC


	17. Two Joshes, The

The nurse stepped out of the room. “I’m done.” she said. “You can go back in now.” He nodded and went immediately back in to her bedside. She was smiling at him. Here she was, broken leg, collapsed lung, lacerations all over her face and body, and she was smiling at him. 

“She was just taking blood.” Donna smiled in a scratchy voice. He sat down gently on the side of her bed, leaned his head into her shoulder and cried. Her hand came up and stroked his hair. 

“Josh.” she said quietly stroking the back of his head. “Josh, look at me.” 

“I can’t.” he said into her shoulder. She brought her other hand up to his face and pulled him up off her shoulder to meet her eyes. 

“I know for a fact that you haven’t been planting roadside bombs in Gaza recently, so you have to stop with the guilt.” she said. “I’m really glad you’re here.” 

“Where else would I be?” 

“Well, you should be at the White House doing your job.” Donna said. She was trying to sound annoyed that he abandoned his post and flew half way around to world to her, but she came up short, pretty much because he abandoned his post and flew half way around the world to her. 

“Leo kicked me out.” Josh confessed. “I had one of your nutties outside the Oval.” Donna sighed and looked up at him. 

“What happened?” she asked concerned. 

“I don’t remember.” 

“Josh...” 

“I really don’t.” he replied. “I just remember I freaked and Leo told me I could come here. Though, quite frankly, I think by then I had made up my mind that I was coming here anyway.”   
She studied him closely and he could see the concern in her eyes. She was worried that he’d had another episode and he wasn’t about to confess to her that he was pretty sure that’s exactly what it was. “Don’t worry about it.” 

“I do worry about it.” 

“As soon as you get home, I’m going to wrap you up in bubble wrap and keep you locked up at home. That should keep you safe for a while.” he said changing the direction of the conversation. 

“Is this going to be trouble for you, being over here?” 

“It’s not.” he promised. “It’s really not. Don’t get all stressed out about it. Everyone’s been asking about you, including Leo and the President. They’re all very concerned about you.” 

“They shouldn’t be concerned about me.” she said quietly. “They have more important things to do.” 

“You’re their friend, Donna. You’re important to them, too.” She dropped her eyes from his gaze and sighed. 

“I just have a hard time believing that at a time like this, they let their senior policy advisor leave.” 

“Their senior policy advisor has been telling the President to carpet bomb Gaza.” Josh said. “I’m not exactly what they need right now. And they let their friend, Josh, go to his girlfriend and their friend Donna’s bedside. The President and Leo are human. Plus, this is the age of technology, I’ve got a cell phone, and trust me, they’ve been calling it. I don’t need to actually be standing in the Oval Office and there are plenty of secure lines on this base. They can get me if they need to.” 

“What do you think he’s going to do?” she asked. 

“I don’t know.” Josh sighed. “I suppose it’s a good sign that he hasn’t bombed anything. I’m not sure they know who’s responsible. Most of the usual suspects are coming forward saying they didn’t have anything to do with it.” 

Donna dropped her head back on the pillow and looked up at the ceiling. She looked so lost, and the sparkle was gone from her eyes. She said she didn’t remember the explosion, and Josh was very thankful for that. He knew the FBI was disappointed by that, but as far as Josh was concerned, if she didn’t remember it, she couldn’t relive it. 

She looked back over at him and studied him. “You really do need to shave.” 

“Well, you’re going to have to endure my scruffy side for a little while. I didn’t bring anything to shave with.” 

“You didn’t pack your shaving kit?” 

“I didn’t pack. Period.” 

She looked at him confused for a second and then her eyes widened. Here it comes... 

“You didn’t pack anything? You came over here with nothing?” she asked incredulously. 

“We’ll, I’ve got my backpack and my passport.” he offered. 

“You didn’t go home first?” 

“I didn’t have that kind of time, Donna. I thought you were dying.” 

“You went from the White House to the airport?” 

“After you got to the hospital and found out I got shot, when did *you* finally go home?” he countered. He knew the answer. It was two days. She’d walked into the hospital that night and left two days later to take a shower, was gone an hour and a half and returned with a packed bag so she didn’t have to leave until he was moved from the ICU. She sighed as she realized he had a point. 

“Why don’t you go back to sleep for a while.” Josh whispered. “I’ll call your mom and see where she is now.” Donna nodded and closed her eyes. When he took his cell phone out of his pocket and started dialing, he heard the click of the morphine drip, breaking off another piece of his heart. 

****************** 

Josh paced the corridor nervously. Donna had been in surgery for hours. When he got back to Washington he was going to knock Kate Harper out for making him take that meeting. He wasn’t here when she needed him. And she was scared. She was scared and he was stuck pacing out here in the hall. The nurses kept throwing wary glances his way. They’d seen his desperation when he came in; and now they knew he worked for the Commander in Chief. He pulled out the White House card pretty quickly. They weren’t sure if they should now cater to him or let him be. He had the diplomatic ranking of a three star general and the last thing they wanted to do was piss him off. If he got this frustrated just waiting to hear how the surgery was going, they couldn’t imagine what he was going to be like if he was mad. 

“Josh?” asked a familiar voice behind him. He spun around and was face to face with Donna’s mother. She looked at him for a second. The fear and anxiety he felt was naked on his face. They had told her when she got here that Donna was currently in surgery and what had happened. “Oh, Josh.” she said quietly and hugged him. He hugged her tightly and when they pulled away, she saw that some of the anxiety had lessened. 

“They told me what happened.” 

“I saw her before they gave her the anesthesia.” he said. “She told me she was scared.” 

Carol Moss nodded her head. If it was any other patient in there, she would start talking about how she’d pull through, but in truth, she was every bit as scared as he was right now, and Josh wasn’t one for empty promises. 

“How long have you been here?” Carol Moss said quietly. “I got here yesterday.” he replied. She nodded and sat down on one of the plastic chairs in the hallway and he had begun to pace again. 

“Have you slept since then?” 

“No.” 

“Were you in the room when this happened?” 

“No. I had to take a stupid diplomatic meeting. When I got back, she wasn’t in the room and she was just about to be put under.” Carol smiled slightly at his term “stupid diplomatic meeting.” He was the senior domestic policy advisor; the President had stepped right into the middle of a Biblical war, and she couldn’t quite imagine any meeting they needed him to take as being stupid. 

“They let you see her?” 

“They didn’t have much choice. The doctor stopped me right before I ran into the OR.” 

Carol grinned up at him. Josh was nothing if not completely devoted to her daughter. She was surprised he even let the doctor stop him. They had told her downstairs that someone from the White House was up here wreaking havoc, which was no surprise to her. He’d called her last night from Donna’s room. But the description of him given by the nurses was priceless and classic Josh. She’d wondered if he had threatened to get the President on the phone yet. He stopped pacing and looked over at her for a long moment. He was unguarded right then. 

“It’s not your fault.” She assured. 

“It is my fault. I sent her there.” 

“No.” Carol said. “If it wasn’t for you, she wouldn’t even have an opportunity to do anything like that. The change in her is astounding. She’s really come into herself. She really loves what she does. And it’s all because of you, Josh. She’s traveled all over the world, all over the country; she’s met presidents, royalty. She’s become so much more than I had ever dreamed for her. She was so lost after Brian left her. She gave up her education for him, and for him to have done what he did...well, let’s just say her confidence was shot.” 

“You wouldn’t have known it the day we met.” Josh laughed. “She walked into our campaign headquarters and took over my office. I don’t know what I’d do without her though, professionally and personally.” 

“Well, I can see how much you love her. It’s written all over your face” Carol noted. “She’s very lucky. And her father and I are very proud of the work she does. She doesn’t get home as much as we would like, but I suppose there will be plenty of time for that after Bartlet’s out of office. For now, she’s doing something good.” 

“Yeah, like getting blown up.” 

“I don’t blame you for that; she doesn’t blame you for that.” 

“I blame me for that.” Carol sighed. She wanted to try to convince him that it wasn’t his fault, but she knew it wouldn’t do any good. He was going to have to figure out a way to make peace with himself on his own. 

“Well, it seems you’re not without your own demons.” Carol said. “You’ve got a big heart, Josh.” 

“There are those back home that would tell you just the opposite.” Josh laughed. 

“You’re one of the President’s closest advisors.” Carol said. “During an international crisis, you’re here in Germany instead of the Oval Office. I think you’ve proven those people wrong.” 

************************** 

Josh sat next to Donna’s bed watching t.v. She had woken up a little while ago for a few minutes and had fallen back asleep again. He was exhausted and emotionally drained. When the doctor had come out of surgery and told them about the complications and the possibility of brain damage, he really thought he had had about as much as he could take. Carol had started quietly crying. When Donna was returned to her room, he pulled the chair up to her bed and laid his head down looking up at her. 

The possibility that she might not be herself when she woke up was too heady for his comprehension. If she did suffer brain damage, would she remember him? Would she remember where she worked? Would she still be funny and caring? What if everything he loved about her had disappeared? 

But she had woken up and asked for him immediately. She had recognized him right off the bat. When she had drifted back off to sleep, Carol had offered to go down and get them food and coffee, and at that moment, Josh had realized he was famished. And that’s where he was now, waiting for Carol to come back with food. 

He turned to look at Donna, and she had her eyes open. She’d apparently been watching him. He was startled at first because it seemed every time he looked at her, her eyes were closed. But now they were on him, searching for something. 

“How do you feel?” he asked softly, smoothing some stray strands of hair out of her face, and then kissing her lightly. She smiled weakly at him and continued to stare at him. “You scared the shit out of me.” he continued. “I was so afraid I lost you.” 

“You’re not going to get rid of me that easily.” she smiled softly. 

“What is it?” 

“You have to go back to Washington.” she said sadly. 

Josh shook his head. Go back to Washington? She wasn’t making any sense. How could she think he’d leave her here? 

“You have to. The President needs you.” 

“Not as much as you do.” 

This wasn’t working, she thought. He needed to go back to Washington. As much as she wanted him to, he couldn’t stay here indefinitely with her, but he’d never do it if he thought she needed him. And she did need him. She’d miss him with every fiber of her being when he was gone.   
But there would be things that needed to be done at home before she got there, and he’d have to ahead of her anyway to take care of it. 

“No.” she said. “I want you here, yes. I want you here to hug me when I’m in pain and tell me stupid jokes and hold my hand, and kiss me when I wake up. But, I need you in Washington more. I need you to go to those peace talks and make this right for me.” she said quietly. “I need you to go back to Washington and help the President make this right for the people who died; make it worth their lives; and make it worth what happened to me.” 

That did it. 

Josh fell for it hook, line, and sinker. She knew exactly how to put it to get him to do it. She told him she needed him to fix it. Peace in the Middle East for Donna? No problem. 

“The summit’s not scheduled for a few days.” he said. “I’m staying here until then.” 

“Kay.” she said smiling at him, and again, he couldn’t believe she was making him go. What if something happened to her again? Not to mention, he wasn’t really sure why the President was even holding these talks. These two countries were ready to bring forth the end of the world, rather than work together. But if it’s what she wanted, it’s what he’d do. Besides, she’d be wheelchair bound for a while and their apartment wasn’t remotely ready to handle that. But as he thought about things that needed to be done, he looked up at her and smirked. 

“What?” she asked cautiously. 

“That will give me plenty of time to talk to you about The Rules.” 

TBC


	18. Two Joshes, The

“Cell phone service sucks up here.” said Kate Harper walking up to where Josh was standing outside the pavilion. 

“Yeah, not many good spots. This is usually one of them.” he replied, redialing Donna’s cell phone number...again. 

“Who are you trying to call at two in the morning? Someone you hate, I hope.” 

“Germany. It's morning over there already.” 

“Your assistant doing better?” 

“She may fly back on Wednesday.” What the hell? Why wasn’t anyone answering her phone? A million nightmare scenarios began to flood his mind. What if she had a relapse? What if something horrible happened again and he was stuck over here? He tried to calm himself as Kate prattled on about the peace talks. He replied every now and again, but continued to dial Donna’s cell phone repeatedly. No. Carol would have called him immediately if something had happened. Unless Donna wouldn’t let her because she knew he’d hop the first flight back to Germany. That’d be just like her. She knew him too well. 

Coming back here was a mistake. He should have put his foot down with her; he was the boss, for crying out loud. Well...mostly the boss...technically the boss. Why is it that he could stand up to her in any number of scenarios but when she sticks her lip out, pouts and says, “I need you,” he’s a basketcase? He was stuck at these peace talks and they were going no where. He supposed that just the fact that all the players being here was a good thing, but they weren’t remotely compromising with each other. Every time they met with the President, he continued to look at them as if questioning to himself where the brilliance was and when they were going to have their big idea. Josh had nothing. His mind was in Germany and he was finding it hard to focus. 

He tried, Lord knew he was trying, because it’s what she asked him to do and she believed in him, but he’d be damned if he could figure out what the hell to tell any of these people to make them work with each other. Especially when all he wanted to do was choke them and shout at them. It’s their stupid battle with each other that almost killed Donna, and did kill two members of Congress and an incredibly decorated, respected, and admired Admiral. Josh was a big enough man to admit that their battle wasn’t stupid to them and there was a much larger picture to it, but...well...it almost killed the woman he loved and so he had an extremely difficult time caring about their problems. 

“It’s spooky here.” Kate announced. 

“What?” he asked putting the phone up to his ear again. He sighed when he was unable to make a connection and dropped his hand to his side. He supposed he probably should pay attention to this conversation. She had been talking for a little while and she was probably making some decent points. She seemed well versed in this issue. 

“Camp David.” she continued. “It’s kind of spooky here, especially at night.” 

“Weren’t you a CIA operative?” Josh asked. 

“Yes.” she answered. “And I’ve certainly been to my fair share of spooky places, but this place is unnerving. It’s like the forest has eyes.” 

“It does.” Josh replied. “There’s sharpshooters in there.” 

“Really?” she asked. “They’re pretty good at hiding themselves.” 

“Well...yeah.” 

“How do you know?” 

“I travel with the President.” Josh reminded. “Ever since I got shot walking with him, I’ve taken a bigger interest in the security that surrounds him. There’s sharpshooters in the woods here. I’ve never actually seen them, but you’re right, they can see you. He’s probably not more than 50 feet away from us right now.” 

“Like if I threw a rock into the woods, I might hit him?” 

“Yeah. But you wouldn’t have too much time to rejoice in your good aim, since he’d probably shoot you in retaliation.” 

“You don’t like me much, do you?” she asked leaning up against the bridge rail next to him. 

“You cut my joke.” he replied lamely. 

“You don’t like what I’m telling the President.” she countered. “You don’t agree with the President that these peace talks are the best course of action.” 

“I don’t care what you tell the President.” Josh shot back. “He listens to everyone’s opinion and makes a decision based on everything he’s heard. He gives equal weight to everything he hears. Sometimes he listens to you; and sometimes he doesn’t. It’s how the game gets played. It doesn’t matter what I think of what we’re doing here. I serve at the pleasure of the President and if this is the cause he wants me fighting for, than that’s what I’m going to do.” 

“Wow, you are just like him.” 

“What?” 

“On our way up here, Toby mentioned when you were getting in, and I asked if he’d heard from you and knew what you thought of all this.” she explained. “I was interested to hear your opinion since you were emotionally invested. He said, ‘well, you heard what Leo had to say.’” 

“What are you talking about?” 

“You and Leo; you’re a lot alike.” 

Josh’s cell phone rang and Kate walked away. Finally! It was Donna’s cell phone. He crossed over to a picnic table, put the phone up to his ear, and sat down. 

“Donna?” 

“Josh?” Something was wrong. She was faint and she sounded upset, like she was crying. His head snapped up at the tone of her voice. Holy shit! What the hell was going on? 

“What happened? Are you okay?” 

“It hurts.” she cried softly. 

“What hurts?” There was silence on her end and he was beginning to panic. “Donna!” He heard a solitary sob on the other end. He dropped his head into his hand as he felt his chest tighten. This was impossible; this wasn’t working. He was half a world away and he couldn’t hold her. She clearly needed him right now and he was stuck in the fucking woods of Maryland with sharpshooters and a lost cause. “Donna!” he called into the phone again. 

“Josh?” asked a different voice. 

“Carol, what the hell is going on?” he demanded immediately. 

“They lowered her pain medication in preparation of discharging her. They’re weaning her off the morphine.” Carol explained. “It’s a little rough on her.” 

“A little?! She sounds like she’s in agony!” 

“Well, yeah, she is.” Carol hedged. Josh could tell by the sound of her voice that it must be pretty hard to be in that room right now watching her daughter go through this pain. 

“This is ridiculous.” he said softening his voice. “I should be there right now.” 

“She wants you there.” Carol reminded. 

“Oh, obviously.” Josh said sarcastically. “I can tell that by the way she’s sobbing on the phone to me. She doesn’t want me here now, she wants me there. That’s where I need to be right now.” 

 

“She wants you here, Josh; but she needs you there.” Carol replied. “She’s right, and you know it. Something good’s got to come out of all this. Maybe you can take this phone call and channel into the motivation to get something done there.” 

“There’s nothing to get done here.” Josh countered. “These people don’t want to work with each other, they don’t want to compromise. They want to blow each other off the planet and be done with it.” 

“The course of history is changing right now, Josh, and you’re sitting right in the middle of it.” Carol said. “This is the most important thing this President’s going to do. This, right here, is what this President is going to go down in history for. You, right now, are witnessing his legacy form.” 

Josh paused for a moment, a little taken back by her impassioned speech. “Wow. Have you been talking to Toby or something?” 

“Joshua...”Carol warned. 

“Did you not here what I said? These people are ready to walk away from the table. They don’t want to talk.” 

“Make them.” 

“Well, okay then.” 

“You guys will think of something, Josh, you always do.” Carol said. “Oh, and can you do something about these reporters?” 

“What reporters?” he demanded, his interest in the conversation peaked again. 

“Time, CNN, Barbara Walters.” Carol rattled off. “They’ve got her cell phone number. I don’t know what to say, I just keep telling them to call CJ. But they keep calling. They all want to talk to her, and when they can’t get her, they’re trying to get something out of me.” 

“Redirect them to me.” Josh ordered. CJ was going to flip when she heard that, but he didn’t care. Reporters were calling Donna’s cell phone, that meant CJ had dropped the ball. 

“What do I say?” she asked. 

“Just give them my cell phone number.” he directed. 

“Okay. You’re the boss.” 

“Sometimes. Can I have her back now?” 

“Hold on.” 

“Josh?” came Donna’s voice. It still sounded shaky, but she seemed more composed and he let out a sigh of relief. 

“Are you feeling better?” he asked softly. 

“Not really.” she admitted. “But I’ve got it more together now.” 

“I should be there.” 

“No. You should be there.” 

“I don’t want to be here; I want to be there.” 

“I’m leaving in a day and a half.” she reminded. “By the time you got here, it’d be time to leave.” 

“But that’s all the more sooner I’d get to see you.” he countered. “I can get to Germany pretty fast.” 

“That you can.” she agreed. “Stay there and do good.” 

“I love you.” 

“I know.” he could hear her smile and he felt his heart lifting. “I love you, too.” 

Josh hit end to the phone and then hit 2 on his keypad. After one ring, CJ picked up. 

“What’s up, mi amore?” she greeted. 

“Don’t be cute with me, CJ.” Josh replied. “What the fuck’s going on?” 

“What are you talking about?” 

“How the hell did reporters get Donna’s cell phone number?” he demanded. 

“Gee, Josh, let’s think for a second. I don’t know, called Verizon and asked for it maybe?” 

“I told you not to be cute with me.” 

“Excuse you?” 

“No. Excuse you.” he bit back. “Do not schedule a single interview, statement, sound bite, or anything else without clearing it through me. Do you understand?” 

“I understand I don’t answer to you.” CJ replied unamused. 

“Oh no? Walk down to Leo’s office and say that.” 

“Josh.” Josh heard the warning tone in CJ’s voice and discarded it. 

“All interview requests come through me.” he repeated. “She’s not giving a single one until I say so, and then I’m dictating the terms. I’m her boss, I’m pulling rank, that’s the way it’s going to be. You’ve got a problem, you take it up with Leo, who I promise you is going to be less than receptive.” 

Josh hit end on his phone and then dropped it onto the table. He dropped his head in his hands and quelled the urge to scream in frustration. He questioned what he was doing for the hundredth time since he stepped onto the plane in Landstuhl. Why the hell did he listen to her? Just that phone call alone shows it was a mistake to leave her. He was half inclined to ask the President to call that colonel and demand he give her the morphine, but he was pretty sure someone would tell the President that was an abuse of power. Maybe he could get Abbey to do it. Either way, he didn’t want to be here. He just wanted to be in Germany. 

TBC


	19. Two Joshes, The

“Donna?” CJ asked popping her head through the apartment door. Donna looked up from her spot in the oversized chair and marked her place in the book she was reading. 

“Come on in, CJ.” Donna invited smiling. CJ smiled when she saw her friend and walked fully into the apartment and closed the door. 

“Dare I ask how you got approval to come over here?” Donna smiled. The first rule Josh had made was the same rule Donna had made for him. All visitors need prior approval from him. Donna’s mother was staying with them until Donna was cleared to go back to work, so she wasn’t without company during the day and someone to take her to physical therapy, but now she had a new appreciation for Josh’s persistent whining during his recovery that she kept him under lock and key. 

“Well, he said that he had some stuff he needed you to research, but he got sucked into a meeting with the President, so I volunteered to bring it over with lunch. I think it was the lunch that swayed him.” CJ explained. 

“And what has he deemed worthy for me to eat?” 

“I don’t remember.” CJ replied waving her hand dismissively. “I stopped listening when he said I could come. I got us cheesesteaks from Big Willie’s.” 

“Oh dear God, CJ, you are the best!” Donna smiled, her eyes growing big with anticipation. 

“Do you want me to help you to the table?” CJ asked hesitantly. 

“No. We have tray tables; we can use those.” Donna replied. She was often hesitant with who she let help her move around. People who didn’t normally help her tended to be awkward at it, and that usually ended in pain for her. CJ set up the tray tables for them and spread their lunches out. 

“So, how’s things at the White House?” Donna asked delving into her large, drippy sub. She smiled joyfully as globs of ketchup slid down to the wrapper. 

“Not nearly as eventful without you there.” CJ replied. “Josh is mostly unbearable. He misses you there so much it’s practically heartbreaking. When are you coming back?” 

“Well, my six weeks are almost up. According to my doctors, I can go back then.” Donna explained. “However, Joshua, the ever clever one, has to approve my return, which he has not done.” 

“He’s not letting you go back?” CJ asked incredulously. 

“No, not yet. He’s making me use some vacation time.” 

“Well, he’s only hurting himself with that one.” CJ said. “He seriously needs you there. He’s got no idea which way is up. You must be going out of your mind here all day.” 

“Well, as you can see, he lets me do certain things. He’ll let me do things like research and stuff so I don’t go completely crazy. Since I can’t move around, I can’t do anything around here, either. But he bought me a new laptop and loaded it up. So I spend a lot of time on the internet. He had the IT guys install some of the programs I use at work so I can do stuff for him.” 

“Okay. Well, that’s fair.” CJ replied. “You let him do some stuff from home. He took conference calls and stuff.” 

“No. He snuck that stuff in.” Donna reminded. “He wasn’t supposed to do most of that.” 

“Oh. Well then, he’s got one up on you then. So, he’s making you use vacation time. When’s that put you back?” 

“Three more weeks.” 

“That’s no so bad then.” 

“And then it’s eight hour days.” 

“Yuck!” CJ exclaimed. “Eight hour days? How the hell is he going to manage that?” 

“Eight hour days at the office.” Donna modified. “We can work at night from here, if we have to.” 

“Eight hour days.” CJ repeated amazed. “I don’t even know what that’s like.” 

“Yeah, should be interesting.” Donna agreed. 

“What did he say about the interviews?” 

“Emphatically no way.” 

“Donna,” CJ hedged. “you should fight him on that one. You really should give an interview to someone. I’m getting calls every day. People want to hear your story.” 

“Well, I didn’t let him give any after Rosslyn, CJ.” Donna reminded. “I thought they’d be too stressful, and I guess now that he thinks about it, he agrees. Not to mention, since he’s my boss, he has to approve any of my press appearances or interviews, which he’s also not doing.” 

“He is a crafty one.” CJ nodded. “Don’t tell him I brought it up. He’ll kill me for sure.” 

“Yes, he was quite annoyed at that.” Donna nodded. 

“He pulled rank! The big baby.” CJ grumbled. Donna smiled in response. CJ didn’t go any further in her bitching of how Josh got to her. He’d never pulled rank before and CJ was noticeably affected by it. Donna found it pretty impressive he’d waited that long, CJ was always on his ass about something. 

“Okay.” CJ continued. “Let’s see if I have his rules right. One, no visitors unless they’ve been previously approved. Does that include the telephone?” 

“Yes.” Donna supplied. “I’m not supposed to answer unless it’s him and then he’ll tell me if someone’s going to call. He’s already authorized both Sam and Ainsley, so I’m allowed to answer their calls.” 

“Okay. Two, apparently he’s trying to keep you on some kind of diet.” 

“Yeah, but since he’s a crappy eater, that one’s not working out so well. So far, he’s just successfully banned my caffeine. But since I don’t have to get up early, I don’t really need it anyway at the moment. It’s cute to watch him try though.” 

“Whatever.” CJ replied. “Number three, an additional two more weeks out of work. Number four, no interviews. Number five, eight hour days. Any more than that?” 

“Yeah. I’m not allowed to watch the news during the day. I can when he gets home though because by then he knows what’s going to be on it. But I’m then only allowed like CNN, MSNBC and CSPAN, not local stuff. He’s afraid of me seeing something violent at the moment.” 

“Okay. Well, he’s not going to be able to enforce that one for all that long. I mean, it’s the news, you work in the White House, you have to know stuff.” CJ argued. 

“Yeah, he knows. It’s just for now. Plus, they’re still showing coverage of the bombing and the investigation and stuff like that. He doesn’t want me to see it accidentally. If he’s around, then, you know, he’d be here for it. He doesn’t want me to see it by myself.” 

“Yeah.” CJ said softly. “Between the ego and the maniacness at the moment, sometimes I forget how sweet he can be.” They were quiet for a moment, before CJ went on. “So that’s it then? Six rules?” 

“No, there’s more, but you don’t want to hear them. They’re sex rules.” 

“Sex rules?!” CJ cried. “You’re right. I don’t want to hear them. Wait. Maybe I do. It might be interesting.” 

“No, CJ, you don’t want to hear them.” Donna assured. 

“All right, fine.” CJ said with a trace of disappointment. “Well, I have to get back.” She stood up and cleared away their lunch and came back into the living room when a thought struck her. “You know, if you want, I’ll ask him if you can watch my briefings during the day, and tell him I’ll give you a heads up if there’s going to be something in there that you might not want see, so you know ahead of time. Then maybe you won’t feel so out of touch.” 

“That’d be great.” Donna said smiling at her thoughtfulness. She bid CJ goodbye and once she was gone, went back to her book. 

***********************   
“Josh.” 

“I don’t want to hear it, Donna.” 

“I wasn’t going to talk about it.” 

“No? Okay. What were you going to say then?” 

“Why were you driving the SUV anyway?” 

“Donna! I just said I didn’t want to talk about it anymore. Leo, CJ, and Toby have been on my ass all day.” 

“Well, I mean, you’ve been popping up on blogs. It’s not like you took the high road with it.” 

“Whatever.” 

“I liked your use of the word scurrilous today though. That was a nice touch.” 

“I thought we were done with this.” 

“I was just asking why you were going to a car dealership anyway.” 

“I don’t know.” he shrugged. “I was driving by, it caught my eye.” 

“You were driving by and it caught your eye.” She reached over and liberated the pint of Ben and Jerry’s from him and dug into it with her spoon. He was sitting in the middle of the couch and she was sitting next to him with her legs draped across his lap so she could rest her leg and they could still be close. Since she’d come back from Germany, this had become a habit for them. And on days when her leg was particularly achy, he’d massage it for her. 

“You’ve never driven a car you had no intention of buying?” he countered. 

“Sure. I just don’t think that’s what you were doing.” 

“I don’t know. I guess I just wanted to see how they handled and how much they were and stuff. All we got between us is my Audi, you sold your car. And my car is kind of small. Don’t you think we should have more room?” 

“For what?” 

“I don’t know.” he shrugged again taking the ice cream back. “For the future.” 

“Ah, for the child that will be born in wedlock?” 

“Among other things.” he said non-chalantly. 

“You want some big ass thing? Because, you know, you’ve got nothing to compensate for.” 

“Well, thanks for your words of praise.” he chuckled. “No. I was actually thinking mid-size SUVs. Like I said, my testosterone was flying.” 

“And I told you not to get it on anyone and you got it all over the Prius.” 

“I thought we were done talking about it.” 

“Okay. I like the other conversation better anyway.” She pulled the ice cream towards her and dipped her spoon in. 

“You want to have THAT conversation now?” he asked. “Over Ben and Jerry’s?” 

“And beer.” Donna added. “I haven’t taken any pain meds at all today. Go get us some beer.” He looked at her for a long minute as if trying to find a reason it would be bad for her. When he came up short, he sighed, gently moved her legs out of the way, went to fetch the beer, and gently joined her on the couch again. 

“Okay. You’re on point then.” He said opening up the bottles and handing her one. “Shoot. First topic.” 

“Kids.” she started. “Might as well go for the big one first, right? How many?” 

“I don’t know.” he said. “A couple?” 

“Like two or three?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Agreed.” 

“Religion of the kids.” 

“Other than your freakish obsession over Christmas, neither one of us is that devout. I guess we should bring them up in both religions.” Josh said. 

Donna thought about that for a minute. “Okay.” she agreed. “I can get behind that. Future employment. Do you want to run for office?” 

“Absolutely not.” he said shaking his head emphatically and digging into the bottom of the ice cream. 

“Are you going to change your mind?” 

“It’s unlikely, but I guess I can’t very well say no.” he replied honestly. 

“All right.” she said slowly. “I guess that will do for now.” 

“I AM going to want to keep running campaigns, and I’m sure there will be a few more presidential campaigns in my future.” he said. She paused for a moment. She figured he was going to say that, but she wasn’t sure what she thought about that. 

“Okay.” she said. “How about we deal with each campaign at the time. We assess our current situation and make a decision based on that? I think that’s the best I can do with that.” 

Josh looked at her for a long moment. He supposed that she had a point there. He couldn’t ask her to agree to him constantly taking almost entire years traveling around the country. Plus, his whole opinion on that might change once they had kids. “Deal.” he said. “Now for you.” 

“Me?” 

“After we get married, are you going to change your name?” 

“Of course.” she answered immediately. “Unless you’re going to be selfish and not share it with me.” 

“Of course I want you to have the same name as me. I just wasn’t sure if you were going to get all feminista about it.” 

“No, Josh. I’m not going to get all feminista about it.” she droned. 

“Good. Work.” 

“Uh, I’m gainfully employed now.” 

“Yes. But what about after kids?” 

“Ah. Am I going to be feminista or June Cleaver?” 

“Something like that.” 

“I’m going to work.” 

“Okay.” 

“No, wait. I might want to stay home.” 

“That’s fine, too.” 

“No, wait. That might make me nuts.” 

“Okay.” halted Josh holding up his spoon to stop the madness about to ensue. “That’s tabled until such time as it’s an issue. I’m fine with either answer.” 

“Okay.” 

“Wedding.” he continued. “Big or little?” 

“I guess it depends on when we want to get married.” she replied. “There’s an election gearing up, and we haven’t really talked about that or what happens after the either.” 

“Well, that discussion is also tabled for the immediate future.” Josh mumbled. “I’m not feeling a hell of a lot of joy in Bob Russel.” 

“I didn’t think you were.” she said softly. “Tabled then, at least for a few months.” 

“I’m not worried about finding a job after the White House.” 

“I’m not worried about you finding a job after the White House either.” she countered. 

“Kay.” 

“Kay.” she shifted closer to him so she could lay her head on his shoulder. 

“I guess that covers the big stuff.” he said. 

“Bigger place.” she ended. 

“Tabled until such time as we actually need one.” he replied. 

“I guess.” she sighed. 

“At the very least it’s tabled until you’re fully healed. It would be ridiculous to consider it before that.” he replied. 

“Kay.” she said closing her eyes. He wrapped his arm around her and lightly stroked her shoulder smiling at how easy that conversation came for them. They were so compatible and he found himself looking forward to each and every thing on that list. The only thing he remained uneasy about was the immediate future plans. Of course, his job was currently secured and likely to stay that way until the end of the term, but he wasn’t sure he wanted to stay that long now. The restrictions he felt when she was hurt suddenly felt suffocating. But what to do next was still a little cloudy at the moment. He was positive he didn’t want to back Bingo Bob, at least not unless he actually won the nomination, and even then, he felt he’d have a hard time supporting him. Bingo Bob wasn’t the real thing. But then again, he hadn’t found anyone else who had remotely come close to Jed Bartlet. 

TBC


	20. Two Joshes, The

"We need a stronger response on the patients' bill. Tell her --” Josh said. 

“Juice it up?” Donna asked, sitting across from him at his desk. 

“High octane!” 

“I thought we wanted a patients' bill of rights?” 

“Not this demon seed. The Republicans won't budge on the liability cap. Patients won't even be able to recoup their out-of-pocket expenses. Some rights.” 

“So when Will said Santos picked up eight more votes from our side?” 

“And a stampede of Republicans--“ 

“It's bad news--you want to distance the White House.” 

“I want the White House in a different galaxy.” 

“Excuse me. Annabeth wondered if she could get a minute later?” Carol said poking her head in asking Donna when she could see the new Deputy Communications Director. 

“Donna's got something for her now.” Josh said. 

“It's Donna she needs. About the Dateline interview.” Carol replied. 

“When am I doing Dateline?” Josh asked Donna confused. 

“Never. I mean, I said no, on your behalf. I'll follow up.” Donna said quickly. Carol left the doorway and Josh studied Donna for a minute. 

“Donna?” 

“Yes, Josh?” 

“Why was I asked to do Dateline?” 

Shit. He had her. She didn’t want to make something up in case he decided it was worth going on t.v. and talking about. She’d decided to reject the interview offer, which is what she had to tell Annabeth. When she didn’t answer him, he knew what was happening. 

“What part of no fucking interviews does the communications department not understand?” he shouted. Donna reached behind her and pushed the door shut, though anyone outside was likely to hear him anyway. 

“I was saying no.” she said. 

“Damn fucking right, you’re saying no!” He paused when he noticed the volume of his voice. He was yelling at her when he was pissed off at CJ and Annabeth, and Kate Harper, come to think about it. She’d been bugging her, too. “It’s just that they’re going to ask you tell the whole story and they want you to break down crying or freak out. I don’t want that for you; I don’t want your parents to have to watch it; and I sure as hell would just as soon not see it either. If you want to talk about it, I’m all ears, or we’ll call someone for you, but not to Stone Phillips.” 

“I know.” she said softly, looking down at her hands. “I’m serious I wasn’t considering it. I don’t remember it anyway.” He sighed and looked at her intensely. He didn’t want to bring it up, but she just gave him the opening. 

“But you do.” he said softly. Her eyes snapped back up to his. 

“I don’t.” she insisted. 

“Not consciously.” he retorted. 

“Not in anyway.” 

“No?” 

“No.” 

“Then why are you waking up screaming?” he asked, and she dropped her eyes again. There was no denying that. She’d woken up three times that week screaming. But admittedly, all three times she didn’t remember the dream. She had a hunch, obviously, but she didn’t actually remember the dream. 

“Josh,” she said looking up to him again. “I’m not...it’s not...” 

“Don’t go there with me, Donna.” Josh shot back a little more harsh than he intended. “I’ve been there, and you’ve been there with me. Hell, sometimes, I STILL go there. You’re having nightmares, which was completely predictable. Let me call Stanley.” 

“It’s just my memory of the explosion surfacing.” she said. “I don’t think a few bad dream meets the requirements of calling a trauma therapist.” 

“Funny, neither did I.” he countered. 

“Josh...” 

“I’ll go with you.” he offered. “You wanted me to call him anyway after my nutty outside the Oval Office.” 

“You said that wasn’t a thing.” 

“I wasn’t about to admit to you it was in Germany.” he said. “The last thing I wanted to do in Germany was make you worry.” 

She sighed and she knew she was beat. She nodded her head in acceptance and he nodded back. 

“What do you think about Santos?” he asked changing the subject. 

“The patients’ bill of rights thing?” she replied. “I think you’re right. I don’t think we should get anywhere near it.” 

“Not with the White House anyway.” he said cryptically. “But there’s some good things in it, more crap than good, but still, there’s some good.” 

“I don’t know what that means.” she said. “Not with the White House?” He shrugged at her and she tilted her head to the side and studied him carefully. This was more than the patients’ bill of rights thing. “Didn’t he say he was leaving Congress?” 

“Yup.” 

“So, I guess it doesn’t really matter what I think of him.” she said. “He’s not going to be there next year.” 

“He is definitely not going to be in Congress next year.” he agreed. 

“Okay, wait. You’ve got a whole thing going here, and I’m a little slow on the uptake at the moment.” she returned waving her hand. “Why are we thinking about him beyond the patients’ bill of rights thing?” 

“Remember when we talked about our immediate future plans?” 

He waited for her to make the connection and when she did, her jaw dropped. “You’re thinking that?” she asked incredulously. 

“I’m not sure yet.” he said. “I’m thinking it, so that’s something because I haven’t thought it about anyone else. I’m thinking I want to dig a little more into him. He’s done good stuff there, stuff I’ve admired. I’m thinking about exploring the possibility.” 

“Really?” 

“What do you think about that?” 

“I think at the moment it’s just research, right?” 

“Yes.” 

“Then I think just that. Just doing research. I don’t know anything more about him than you do.” 

“Yeah.” he said thoughtfully. “The thing is, I’m pretty sure we’ll like him.” 

“We?” 

“Not we?” 

“Well, if you like him, I’m not going to stick around and not like him.” 

He stared at her for a moment and tried to follow that. “Okay. We can just say the words, the door’s closed, a door, by the way that we’ve had sex up against, so I think it’s safe to talk about leaving in here.” She blushed at the memory he invoked. “Okay.” he said. “Now, I’m remember the sex thing and getting completely distracted.” 

“You’re talking about leaving a job you love.” 

“Loved.” he corrected. “Not so much anymore.” 

“The honeymoon’s over?” 

“It’s been over for about a year and you know it.” 

“What if I don’t like him as much as you do?” she asked. “What then?” 

“I don’t think that’s going to happen, but if it does, are you going to want to stay here without me?” 

“Absolutely not.” 

“You can, you know.” he said. “I’d be okay with it; it’d be nice for you to help the new guy out a bit.” 

“Don’t be an idiot.” she countered. “You’re the reason why I work here.” 

“Not the President?” 

“He’s secondary.” 

Josh smiled at her response. Since the first campaign she’d been loyal and devoted to him. She was pissed at people he was pissed at, and usually didn’t forgive them as fast. She’d been his sounding board in everything; shown him unfailing support when he needed it; and got drunk with him when he needed to lick his wounds. And sadly, he thought, the next person in the job might not recognize her talent. She probably would end up being unhappy anyway. 

“Okay.” he said. “Then dig up everything you can on him.” 

“It’s your project.” she replied. “You’re not going to do the research?” 

“You seriously think I’m going to do a thorough enough job?” 

“Enough said.” 

“I thought so.” he laughed. “Pull everything you can find and we’ll go over it together and make up our minds.” 

TBC


	21. Two Joshes, The

“Wow.” said Donna. 

“Yeah.” Josh replied. 

“So Matt Santos.” 

“Who knew?” 

“You apparently.” 

They were sitting on their bed Sunday morning with all Donna’s research spread around them. They’d just finished going through it all and it’d taken them the better part of the day. They had been so engrossed in Matt Santos’s professional life, they never even gotten dressed that day and instead of actually cooking, they just kept ordering food delivered, rather than break their stride. There was currently a nearly empty pizza box on the bed that they were devouring while reviewing the research. 

“Well, I didn’t know know, I just thought.” he replied. He was just as impressed at the moment as Donna was. Santos’s voting record, his military record, the things he did on the local level, he’s the picture of a President. 

“What about the Latino thing?” Donna asked. “Think that will be an issue?” 

“Oh, I’ll make it an issue.” Josh assured. “A big one. That’s a huge voting demographic there. The first minority President? The republicans can’t touch most of this stuff. Look at this man.” 

“Okay. Well, saying that he is strong enough to get past Russell and now apparently Hoynes, is he strong enough to beat Vinnick?” 

“Just about.” Josh said looking over a packet of paper. 

“Just about isn’t good enough, Josh.” Donna replied. 

“No, I mean right now he’s just about strong enough. We’ll need to groom him and make him into a viable candidate. By the time the primary is over, he will be.” 

“So you have a plan?” 

“The beginnings of one.” 

“Okay, so here’s something we didn’t think of yet. Money.” she continued. “If he wasn’t planning on running again, he probably hasn’t been fundraising. If he can’t fund a congressional campaign, he can’t fund a presidential campaign, which means he’s not going to be able to pay us, at least not remotely near what you should be getting. We have no war chest going up against Russell and Hoynes.” 

“You and I can pay our own way for a while.” he replied casually, but it sparked a reaction from her all the same. 

“Pay our own way?” 

“Yeah.” 

“With?” 

“Our large savings accounts.” he replied. 

“Which would have to fund our regular expenses in addition to traveling for months and months.” 

“Yes.” 

“Have you experienced a head trauma?” she asked. 

“Nope.” 

“And if we don’t make it out of the primaries?” 

“We will.” 

“And if we don’t?” 

“It won’t take long to recover if I’m in the private sector.” 

“Josh!!” 

“This is a chance we’d have to take.” he said. “Besides, we don’t know that he’s not going to slam the door in our faces.” 

“Slam the door in our faces?” 

“We’re going to have to fly to him to pitch it to him.” 

“Fly to Texas?” 

“Yeah.” 

“We’re just going to show up on his doorstep?” 

“Yup.” 

“This is how this is done?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Two people in their pajamas in bed one Sunday morning pick a new president over pizza and Chinese.” 

“We’re setting a new trend here, Donna.” he smirked. 

“This is what Leo did?” 

“No I think Leo fell over and had your head trauma.” Josh said stretching out and rolling to face her, she was sitting with her bad leg extended and her good leg bent up looking skeptically down at her. He smiled and propped himself up to kiss her. 

“Talk about a leap of faith here, Josh.” she said as he gently pushed her back into the pillows.   
“Is this how you’re going to make your case to the good Congressman?” 

“You think it’ll help?” he whispered against her neck. 

“Hold on there, Romeo.” she halted pushing him up a bit. “What about me?” 

“I’m taking care of you right now.” he leered, dipping his head to pull her earlobe into his mouth. 

“What am I going to do on this campaign?” 

“I don’t know yet.” he sighed. 

“Josh!” 

“Donna, in the beginning, it’ll be you, me, and the Congressman and the limited staff we can poach from his office. The three of us are going to be doing everything. We’re both going to be doing whatever needs to be done. As we pick up steam and donations and we can hire staff, we’ll delegate the easier stuff. We’ll find exactly what your nitch is going to be on the campaign trail. I don’t know, maybe you’ll do media targeting.” 

“Really?” she asked. 

He nodded in response and looked at her. “There’s a million things you can do that I, quite frankly, would trust to a very few people.” 

“Seriously?” 

“Yes.” 

“You’re not just saying that so I’ll say yes and you’ll get campaign sex?” 

“Donna, if this goes where I think it will, six months from now we’ll have DNC funding and a huge staff, and you’ll be the only one on that entire staff that will know what I’m thinking and won’t fuck up.” 

“Okay.” she relented. “I will deny you sex if you go back on your word to me.” 

“Have I ever done that before?” 

“No.” she admitted. He smiled and went back to her neck. She dropped her head back, so he had better access. “So, what about the skeletons in his closet?” 

“If there are any, I don’t know about them.” he replied. “But we’ll have to make him tell us about them if he agrees.” 

“So Matt Santos then?” she asked as he pulled her tank top over her head. 

“Yeah. But let’s stop talking about other men right now.” 

“Kay.” 

******************** 

Matt and Helen Santos stared at Josh and Donna in a stunned silence. When Matt had opened the door, he had understandably mistaken their visit as Josh trying to get him to run for Congress again. But when Josh began laying out his plan, they fell speechless. Josh did nearly all the talking, every now and then Donna jumped in with statistics on his voting record and how that would play out to the country at large on different issues. 

Donna look cautiously over at Helen. The other woman was eyeing her like she betrayed the Sisterhood by asking her to leave her kids for a dark horse campaign with no money. Donna couldn’t really say she blamed her because if the roles were reversed, she would probably feel the same way. 

“I think I’m going to start getting the kids ready for bed.” Helen announced slowly. Donna could tell she was a little overwhelmed and probably wanted to absorb this information outside their presence. 

“You think I can beat Russell and Hoynes?” Matt asked Josh again. 

“Yes, sir.” 

“And more importantly, you think I can beat Arnie Vinnick?” 

“It’ll be a tight race, but yes, sir.” Josh said again. “Once we get to that point, we’ll have the money to bring on more heavy hitters.” 

“So, that’s it then? Smooth sailing right to the White House.” 

“No.” Josh qualified. “It’s not going to be smooth sailing at all. But yes, I think we’ll end in the White House.” 

Matt looked over at Donna. She hadn’t said much, she just casually threw out facts on his voting history when Josh needed them. Matt was pretty impressed with how well prepared she was. 

“And you think this, too?” Matt asked her. 

“I think I’m looking at the next President of the United States if you say yes.” she replied. “President Bartlet felt the same way you do right now when Leo McGarry came to have this conversation with him. The President said yes, Leo went and got Josh and they got him elected President twice. He’s certainly not without experience in this.” 

Josh threw a glance in her direction and kept a serious expression, despite wanting to push her down on the couch and kiss her stupid right now. 

“I’m a three term congressman that nobody knows.” Matt said to her. 

“President Bartlet was an unknown Governor from New Hampshire.” She shot back. “And now he’s one of the greatest minds ever to hold that office.” 

“You’ve got quite a sales pitch there.” Matt smiled and Donna shrugged. Matt turned back to Josh. “I can see why you brought her along.” 

“Sir, we obviously don’t expect you to say yes or no tonight.” Josh said. “But the filing date is only about two weeks away, so there isn’t much time. Talk about it with your wife, and you know how to reach me when you make up your mind.” Josh stood up and Donna and Matt followed his lead. “But if you say yes, I will stop at nothing to make you the next leader of the free world.” 

“And you’d leave your job at the White House for this?” he asked skeptically. 

“To ensure that a republican doesn’t win in November?” Josh countered. “The President will walk me to the gates himself.” 

Matt bid them goodnight and a Merry Christmas and they walked back out to their rental car. Once inside they took a look back at the house. 

“What’d you think?” Josh asked her. 

“I think he’s going to go upstairs to his family and his wife’s going to punch him in the head.” Donna replied. 

“Yeah. She didn’t look too keen on the idea. I think she’ll be hard to come around.” 

“What did you think?” she asked. 

“I think he wants to do it.” Josh replied. “I’m just not sure if he’s going to.” 

TBC


	22. Two Joshes, The

“Donna, thanks for meeting me.” Will said shaking her hand across his desk. 

“Sure, Will.” she smiled sitting down. “What can I do for you?” 

“Come work for me, and convince Josh to, too.” Will stated bluntly. 

“Come work for you?” she asked confused. 

“I’ve heard rumors.” Will confessed. “And I also know I’m not the only one that’s been after Josh to run their campaign. He must be feeling pretty overwhelmed right now.” 

“No, he’s not feeling overwhelmed.” Donna denied. And he wasn’t. He knew who he wanted to support and Santos had said yes. Josh had talked to the President already, but it wasn’t common knowledge yet that they were leaving. In fact, he had another week to go. Donna was going to stay the first two weeks after his absence to help the new guy get settled in, and then she was going to join him in New Hampshire. 

“I can’t say I know what it’s like to be hunted like that.” Will droned as if she hadn’t spoken. “But the Vice President is the democratic frontrunner, he’s got a war chest with no end in sight, and with Josh on board we can bring him all the way.” 

“Hadn’t Josh made it pretty clear that he doesn’t support the Vice President?” Donna asked him. She specifically remembered Josh complaining about Will bugging him to join him and threatening him when he didn’t. 

“I thought maybe you could sway him.” Will said. 

“You want me to convince him to work for Russell.” Donna said. 

“If anyone can convince him, it’s you.” 

“Let me get this straight.” Donna said. “He’s already turned you down, but you want me to lure him over with promises of money, to work for a candidate he doesn’t believe in; you want me to go to him and ask him to be less than he is?” 

“Well, when you put it that way...” 

“I am putting it that way.” Donna snapped standing up. “Not many people believed in Jed Bartlet either, Will. But Josh, Leo, Toby, CJ and Sam did, and we’re all here because of it. You want to be on the winning side in the primary, you should consider joining us. Until then, to use your own words, get out of our way.” 

She turned on her heel and stormed out of his office, nearly slamming it behind her. Friggin’ Will, she huffed as she stomped along. She could imagine exactly the tactics Will would have thought she might employ to get Josh to change her mind, then she smiled ruefully. He would have been right; she could get him to agree to just about anything if she were naked, but she wasn’t that sneaky and underhanded...well, she did want to replace the living room furniture, but this wasn’t on the same level as that. She pushed open the door to the bullpen so hard, it bounced off the door stop and nearly smacked her back in the face. Josh was standing outside his office talking to CJ and they both looked up when she stormed in. She stood wordlessly in front of him. She didn’t have to; he felt the anger radiating off of her. 

“What the hell happened?” he demanded. She shook her head unable to speak. “Come on.” he said taking her gently by the elbow and leading her into his office. When the door was closed he stood in front of her rubbing her upper arms, which were tightly crossed. “What’s going on?” he asked gently. 

“Will the weasel.” she replied. Josh tried to hide his smirk because she was obviously extremely upset. 

“Will Bailey, I assume.” he said. 

“Yes.” 

“What did Will do that caused this?” he asked. 

“I probably should have calmed down first before I came over here.” Donna said, now rethinking this. To say he wasn’t going to be thrilled was an understatement. 

“Well, it’s too late for that.” he said. “What’s going on?” 

“He wants me to convince you we’re better off working for Russell.” she blurted. 

“I’ve already turned him down.” 

“I know.” 

“Repeatedly.” 

“I know.” she said again. “He said if anyone could convince you, I could.” 

Well, that was true, Josh thought. There really wasn’t anything he could think of that he wouldn’t do for her. If she pleaded a good enough case, he most probably would go work for Russell. 

“He said that?” 

“Yes.” 

“What did you say?” 

“Some stuff.” she shrugged. “I told him to get out of our way.” Josh smiled at how she threw his words back at him. “We better win now, Josh, I’ll be damned if I have to hear I told you so from freaking Will Bailey.” 

“Well, if I wasn’t motivated before, I sure am now.” he quipped back. She let out an involuntary laugh and he wrapped his arms around her and rubbed her back. “Don’t worry about Will.” 

“Kay.” 

“One week left.” 

“Three for me.” she said sadly. 

“It’s only fair that you help my replacement for a bit. All you’re doing is showing him around and holding his hand for a bit, figuratively speaking, of course.” 

“I guess.” she sighed. She broke away and went back out to her desk. Josh waited until she left her desk before sneaking out of his office and heading over to the Vice President’s offices. 

“Hang on, Toby.” Will said to his speaker phone, “they just told me Josh was here.” Will stood up from his desk without putting Toby on hold as Josh walked into the room, stopping in the middle. “I don’t suppose you’re coming to accept my offer.” 

“Will, you aren’t the first person that’s tried to manipulate me by using Donna, and unfortunately, you won’t be the last. It’s no stroke of genius on your part, but it’s being met with the same disgust from me as it’s always been. Bingo Bob --” 

“Or commonly known as the Vice President to you.” Will interrupted. 

“-- is a cardboard cutout. He was hand picked by the republicans because Vinnick can wipe the floor with him in November. In fact, we nominate Russell, and Vinnick doesn’t even need to campaign. This country’s not stupid, they will not elect him. This is not the way you want to start these campaigns off. I’ve been around longer than you, I’m better at this than you, and I’m going to win. And if you pull this shit with Donna again, I promise you, things will get ugly. I’ve got a lot more people in this town that owe me favors than you do.” 

“You’re never going to get Matt Santos elected, Josh.” Will returned. “Noone’s ever even heard of him.” 

“Watch me.” he replied turning and walking about of the room. Will remained standing for a moment before sitting down with a long sigh. 

“You just challenged Josh?” Toby asked through the phone breaking the silence. 

“It would appear that way.” Will replied. 

“Are you an idiot?” 

TBC


	23. Two Joshes, The

“Donna.” 

“Good morning, Leo.” Donna smiled from where she was bent over her desk writing something, but hadn’t looked up yet. 

“I want you to meet the new Deputy Chief of Staff.” 

“Oh, I’m sorry.” she said quickly and stood up to face them. 

And froze. 

“Cliff!” she nearly shouted with wide eyes. 

“Hi, Donna.” Cliff Calley greeted her back. 

“You two know each other?” Leo asked looking back and forth between them. 

“Uh, yeah.” Donna stammered. “We met a few years ago.” 

“Okay.” Leo nodded. “Well, Cliff’s our new guy, Donna. So, show him around and help him out a bit.” Then Leo turned to Cliff as Donna tried to hide her utter shock. “As I told you before, Donna’s not staying. She’s leaving to join Josh on the Santos campaign, but she agreed to stay on for a little bit to help you get your feet wet.” 

“Thanks, Leo.” Cliff nodded. “I really appreciate it, Donna.” 

“Sure.” she replied. 

“I’m just going to take him into Josh’s...well, his office.” Leo said pointing to the empty office. Donna nodded quickly. 

“I’ll be in in a few minutes.” Donna replied. “I’ve just got to go...I have to....do a thing.” she said pointing toward the bullpen doors. Leo gave her a strange look and he and Cliff turned around and walked into the office. Donna frantically dove into her tote bag and pulled out her cell phone and tore off out of the bullpen. She pushed open the doors to the Rose Garden, quickly checked to see that she was alone, and hit one on her speed dial. 

“Hey! What’s up?” Josh greeted on the other end. 

“I’ll give you this, Joshua,” she began laughing. “when something blows up in your face, it’s massive.” 

“What’s going on?” he asked. 

“I just met the new Deputy.” she replied. 

“And?” he prompted. 

“It’s Cliff.” 

“Cliff? Cliff who?” 

“Calley!” 

Silence. 

“You’re shitting me.” he said after a moment. “I don’t believe it.” 

“Cliff Calley.” she repeated. “The republican.” 

“I’m more concerned with the Cliff Calley your ex-whatever the hell he was part.” Josh replied. “You can’t work for him for two weeks. Go tell Leo you’re leaving today.” 

“No, no.” Donna retorted. “You made this bed, now we have to lie in it.” 

“Don’t talk about laying in beds when referencing this man.” Josh ordered and Donna laughed. His discomfort with the situation was getting more and more amusing. This was just Josh’s luck. “You can’t be there working of him for two weeks in MY office!” 

“Well, first of all, I’m not really working for him, I’m just helping him get accustomed to working in the White House.” she smiled in return. “And secondly, it’s not YOUR office, it’s CLIFF’S office.” 

“There’s like a hundred things wrong with this.” he said in a totally disbelieving tone. “I mean, the irony in this is like...I don’t know what.” 

“Well said there.” Donna replied. 

“I’m in fucking Texas, Donna!” he shouted back. “And you’re there with Cliff the Wonder Republican.” 

“At YOUR request!” she reminded. 

“I’m glad you’re having fun with this.” he shot back. 

“Want me to have Charlie haze him?” Donna laughed. “He did a pretty good job of making CJ his bitch.” 

“YES!” 

“Joshua...” 

“Well, then why did you ask?” he shot back. 

“You’re cute when you’re jealous.” she teased. 

“This is not jealously!” 

“No?” she sang. “What is it then? Because I know it’s not lack of trust in me.” 

“No. It’s lack of trust in Cliff-Republican-being-diary-reading-slept-with-you-twice-Calley!” 

“You’re afraid he’s going to chase me around the desk?” 

“I wouldn’t put anything past that guy!” 

“I think I can take him.” she assured. “I’m taller than him after all.” 

“This is so unfair.” he muttered. 

“I’m the one that’s got to work with the guy!” she cried indignantly. 

“He makes one move towards you and I’ll bury him!” Josh vowed. 

“All right, Caveman.” Donna quipped. “I have to get back in there. I wasn’t exactly sly in my running out here to call you.” 

“Don’t forget that I love you!” 

“Got it.” 

“And how good I am in bed!” 

“Thinking about it right now.” 

“And...you are?” 

“Goodbye, Joshua.” 

“Bye.” he grumbled in return. 

She hung up the phone, and still laughing and shaking her head, walked back inside the building. 

********************* 

Josh watched the cab slowly drive down Main Street and stop in front of him. He smiled when he recognized the person in the back. He hadn’t seen her since his last day at the White House and he really, really missed her. She smiled brightly at him, took her suitcase and threw it into the back of the Cherokee he was leaning up against. 

“Hi.” she greeted leaning up against him and kissing him. 

“Hi.” 

“Hi.” the brunette woman next to him greeted. 

“Hi.” Donna replied extending out her hand to Ronna, who enthusiastically shook it. 

“Ronna.” Ronna smiled introducing herself. 

“Actually, it's Donna.” Donna corrected smiling in response. 

“It's Ronna.” Ronna repeated. 

“No, really, it's Donna.” 

“I'm quite certain it's Ro--“ 

“Ronna, it's Donna. Donna, it's Ronna.” Josh finally jumped in. “Donna’s working with us, too.” Josh said to Ronna. “She’s also my future wife, so that might end up being beneficial information to you in the future. Donna, Ronna’s from the Congressman’s Washington office. She’ll be with us a lot.” The two women smiled warmly at each other again. 

“How’s he doing over there?” she asked turning around and leaning up against him. 

“He’s doing all right.” Josh shrugged dropping his arm around her. “He doesn’t like this stuff. He doesn’t like the meet and greet. He doesn’t understand why he’s not just diving right in and talking about his issues.” 

“You told him nobody knows who he is and he needs face recognition first?” she asked. 

“I did tell him that.” Josh smiled. “I think we got a live one here; I don’t think he’s just going to fall into line.” 

“He won’t.” Ronna assured. “Matt’s always been his own man. He believes in being genuine with people. He’s no good at selling something he’s not.” 

Donna arched her brow at Ronna’s informality. “We don’t want the Congressman to be something he’s not.” she said. “As a matter of fact, that last thing we want him to be is something he’s not. He’ll have plenty of time to talk about his issues until he’s blue in the face, but no one’s going to listen to him if they don’t know who he is.” Josh smiled and dropped his head. He was starting to fear that he’d created a monster. Donna was driven now, especially since all their friends and co-workers thought they were nuts. The only person who seemed to understand was Sam when he’d talked to him earlier. Sam just accepted that if Josh left the White House, Santos must be the guy. He felt her gloved hand grab his and squeeze. 

“Did you stop the mail?” he asked smiling. 

“Yup.” she nodded. 

“It’s going to be a while before we’re there again.” he said. 

“And I put all our accounts on-line, so all the statements will be emailed to us.” she replied. 

“You had our phone forwarded and talked to the super?” 

“Yup.” 

“Cleaned out the fridge?” 

“This is not the first time I’ve been on a campaign, Joshua.” Donna shot back. 

“I’m just going through the checklist.” he defended. 

“It was my list.” she retorted. “I know what’s on it. I know what I was supposed to do.” 

“All right, all right.” he said quickly giving in. She’d been antsy to join him this past week. She was excited about what they were about to start, and she had confidence in them and his plan. They watched as Santos finished up talking to the group he was with and start heading across the street to them. 

“Ready?” he asked him smiling. 

“Let’s get the man elected President.” 

THE END


End file.
